Long Battle With Health Issues
Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2012 5:49 pm
My story involves a battle with many health issues during my adult life. As a child I was diagnosed with asthma. I fought night and day to have a normal life and breath with ease. But in the 60's and 70's there was not much help for asthmatics. As I grew up and graduated from high school my asthma improved and I went in to remission. Around age 30 I found myself in the hospital with pneumonia and shortly thereafter my asthma came back. Before and during these years I gave birth to 5 wonderful children and continued my battle with asthma. I found myself having many more issues with other health problems. I began to have muscle weakness and gynecological problems. I was treated for back problems and was told I might have fibromyalgia, but did not get a sure diagnoses. I ended up having a hysterectomy and shortly before that I had surgery to repair my vocal chords and remove nodules. Since then my health has drastically gotten worse.
In my 40's I went back to college in the hopes of becoming a teacher. I was able to graduate while raising my children and taking care of my disabled husband. During my schooling I had surgery on my shoulder because I could not move my arm and it had to be shaved and decompressed. I had problems swallowing and had surgery to dialate my esophagus because of a hiatal hernia. Shortly there after, I found a job as an Early Head Start Teacher and love working in this profession. However, In the last 3 or 4 years I have had major health issues that have continued to appear and it seems as if out of no where.
It started with having severe dizziness, and headaches with my muscle pain getting worse. I was tested for heart disease, MS, Lupus, among many other things. I had an MRI of my brain and was told I had lesions around my brain. My back problems got drastically worse and I ended up bed ridden for a week and in ER. I continued to see many doctors for my muscle pain, headaches, dizziness, and back issues. My hips began to have pain and my legs were very stiff and painful upon waking up and I struggled daily to keep going and stay working. I have had so many tests it is hard to keep track. My muscles began to hurt more widespread and with intensity. I started having anxiety attacks because I was scared of my dizziness and balance issues and this intensified my other health issues. I was told I have fibromyalgia and I decided to see a different neuro and see what his diagnoses would be. Totally different from that I was told I had a series of mini strokes and that I had small vesticular disease. I went back in the hospital again and had to have my esophagus dialated yet again. I then began having sleeping issues and found myself having to have nightly oxygen due to loss of oxygen while sleeping. My muscles of course were more painful and still wide spread with my legs being the worse. As time progressed and over the last few months my health issues have overlapped with many diagnoses. Last week I was admitted in the hospital having to have a GI tube put in due to bloating and severe pain in my stomach. I stayed there for a week. Was released with two more diagnoses to add to my list. At this point I have a diagnoses in all of the following areas; asthma, arthritis (upper and lower back), bursitis in my hips, carpal tunnel, fibromyalgia, gastritis, hiatal hernia, ulcer, high cholesterol, vertigo/balance issues, mini strokes, small vesticular disease, and still wondering about the MS diagnoses. That is over 10 diagnoses.
Having all of these health issues has made me start to feel very depressed especially over the last week. I have no energy and want to stay in bed. I am crying often and feeling as if there is no hope for me. I have worked so hard to get my job and graduate at a late age in life and now that is jeopardy due to my health issues and always missing work. I feel as if I am losing hope. I can't help to feel what is next? How many more health issues can I handle? My body is falling apart and my mind is rumbling with why's and how's. I can not help but wonder if this is all related to some underlying condition, but have not been told other wise. I know I was only released from the hospital 2 days ago but I have no intentions of doing anything. I feel as if I am stuck in this mood that I can not get out of. I just start crying out of no where. I am not sleeping. I have so many medications that I take I am losing track of what to take and when. I have always been level minded and determined to fight for what I want, but now I feel as I can not be strong any more or keep going because of having so many health issues. I just want to get my quality of life back and feel good. It has been so long since I have woke up feeling strong, healthy, rested and alert. I can not concentrate and am isolating myself not wanting to do very much. I want to sleep a lot because I do not sleep at night. Is all of this normal for me to have this going on? What can I do to feel better about myself? I am not on any meds for depression, but feel as if I was put on one that would be another to add to the list of my already 20 pills and 3 inhalers. I just want some hope. I do not like feeling so sad and depressed and I just can not help it. Does anyone have a suggestion on what I can do? I know it is just a matter of time and I must face the obvious that I will soon no longer be able to work. But I have struggled so long to keep going and now feel as if I have no choice but to give in to these health issues and face reality. I know I am in denial and want the best for me but how do I get that when it seems as if there is no hope? Please give me some ideas on what I can do to get my life back on track and feel better about what is happening to me. Desperately seeking advice. Mary
In my 40's I went back to college in the hopes of becoming a teacher. I was able to graduate while raising my children and taking care of my disabled husband. During my schooling I had surgery on my shoulder because I could not move my arm and it had to be shaved and decompressed. I had problems swallowing and had surgery to dialate my esophagus because of a hiatal hernia. Shortly there after, I found a job as an Early Head Start Teacher and love working in this profession. However, In the last 3 or 4 years I have had major health issues that have continued to appear and it seems as if out of no where.
It started with having severe dizziness, and headaches with my muscle pain getting worse. I was tested for heart disease, MS, Lupus, among many other things. I had an MRI of my brain and was told I had lesions around my brain. My back problems got drastically worse and I ended up bed ridden for a week and in ER. I continued to see many doctors for my muscle pain, headaches, dizziness, and back issues. My hips began to have pain and my legs were very stiff and painful upon waking up and I struggled daily to keep going and stay working. I have had so many tests it is hard to keep track. My muscles began to hurt more widespread and with intensity. I started having anxiety attacks because I was scared of my dizziness and balance issues and this intensified my other health issues. I was told I have fibromyalgia and I decided to see a different neuro and see what his diagnoses would be. Totally different from that I was told I had a series of mini strokes and that I had small vesticular disease. I went back in the hospital again and had to have my esophagus dialated yet again. I then began having sleeping issues and found myself having to have nightly oxygen due to loss of oxygen while sleeping. My muscles of course were more painful and still wide spread with my legs being the worse. As time progressed and over the last few months my health issues have overlapped with many diagnoses. Last week I was admitted in the hospital having to have a GI tube put in due to bloating and severe pain in my stomach. I stayed there for a week. Was released with two more diagnoses to add to my list. At this point I have a diagnoses in all of the following areas; asthma, arthritis (upper and lower back), bursitis in my hips, carpal tunnel, fibromyalgia, gastritis, hiatal hernia, ulcer, high cholesterol, vertigo/balance issues, mini strokes, small vesticular disease, and still wondering about the MS diagnoses. That is over 10 diagnoses.
Having all of these health issues has made me start to feel very depressed especially over the last week. I have no energy and want to stay in bed. I am crying often and feeling as if there is no hope for me. I have worked so hard to get my job and graduate at a late age in life and now that is jeopardy due to my health issues and always missing work. I feel as if I am losing hope. I can't help to feel what is next? How many more health issues can I handle? My body is falling apart and my mind is rumbling with why's and how's. I can not help but wonder if this is all related to some underlying condition, but have not been told other wise. I know I was only released from the hospital 2 days ago but I have no intentions of doing anything. I feel as if I am stuck in this mood that I can not get out of. I just start crying out of no where. I am not sleeping. I have so many medications that I take I am losing track of what to take and when. I have always been level minded and determined to fight for what I want, but now I feel as I can not be strong any more or keep going because of having so many health issues. I just want to get my quality of life back and feel good. It has been so long since I have woke up feeling strong, healthy, rested and alert. I can not concentrate and am isolating myself not wanting to do very much. I want to sleep a lot because I do not sleep at night. Is all of this normal for me to have this going on? What can I do to feel better about myself? I am not on any meds for depression, but feel as if I was put on one that would be another to add to the list of my already 20 pills and 3 inhalers. I just want some hope. I do not like feeling so sad and depressed and I just can not help it. Does anyone have a suggestion on what I can do? I know it is just a matter of time and I must face the obvious that I will soon no longer be able to work. But I have struggled so long to keep going and now feel as if I have no choice but to give in to these health issues and face reality. I know I am in denial and want the best for me but how do I get that when it seems as if there is no hope? Please give me some ideas on what I can do to get my life back on track and feel better about what is happening to me. Desperately seeking advice. Mary