Depression Understood Forums

Hello screambefree,

Welcome to the forums. First off we do have a depression chat room that might benefit your visiting, it is connected with the forums. Hope you give it a try.

Perhaps, get in touch with the doctor that gave you the meds and let them know what it is doing to you. Maybe try something different. Not everyone can take that medication. Not a professional here, just saying what I have seen with others.

Also ask, if you want, if there is a free clinic where you can talk to a proper doctor about your depression. Just a thought.

Good luck.

Warmsoul

Dear screambefree,

I am so sorry for you. It truly sounds what you have been going through is horrible.

Not only are you experiencing the roller coaster emotions caused by, what appears, a mental illness (like maybe depression or something else), you have the added pressure of a husband who wants you not to feel/react the way you do; which that alone would cause more panic, anxiety etc.

Instead of being supported you are being attacked; that is so unfair; you deserve to by supported.

You mentioned you are working and he is not; does that mean he takes care of the baby while you are at work? You mention he may leave you; does that mean he would take the baby?

Do you have any family or friends who are supportive of your situation?

It may be helpful for you and your husband to have a break from each other, if possible. I believe when mates become unsupportive of each other that time apart helps them realize what they have and become willing to be supportive.

I think it is important that you identify what support you get from him. Maybe keep track on a paper; two columns "supportive" "not supportive"; under each column write down things he says or does that fit under each column. Do this each day; maybe on a break at work. Then after a week or two add up the number under each column.

If he is 70% or higher not supportive, then you may want to consider if he may be adding to your anxiety / panic attacks and, I hate to say it, consider a long term seperaion. It make take that for him to realize he needs / must be supportive for you to get better.

It will eat at you if you have to 'pretend' who you are so he is happy. A life of walking on egg shells so another person is happy is not healthy for you or your child. Keep alert of what is happening.

You can get through this period. You will find a medication that can help. Go to NAMI.org and look at the information on medications. If you have a local NAMI office (which you can find at that website), call to see if there is any suggestions.

You will succeed.

Take care,
Kathy

Big big hugs. You are going through a lot. In addition to whatever mental disorder you might already have, is post partum depression likely? This is very common. If that's the case, there's reason to believe that with proper help and time this can get better, especially for you and your baby.

As far as your partner, I do know depression is very very hard on our partners and he might be struggling with his own issues too given he cannot find a job. Take care of yourself and your baby first. Sometimes if people get through the worst in a marriage they come out stronger.

Since you are in the USA, there are community mental health clinics that offer sometimes free and sliding scale services in many communities, even small towns. Call social services or the Red Cross or your ob/gyn to ask about what may be available in your community for low income people. If you took celexa before and it helped, maybe that would be the best route for you now. But I would wager therapy would help a whole whole lot. You are going through so much and therapy would provide an outlet and help you work through all this. Sometimes low cost clinics provide therapists too. You need find what is available in your community on a sliding scale. Sometimes they treat for free or as low as $5 a session. So its definitely worth looking into.

Tell your doctor the buspar is making you too sleepy and go from there. Anti-anxiety meds often have this side effect, but as far as another panic attack, now that you are off the prozac, you might not have another. But its understandable that the anxiety is high with all you are going through right now.

Wishing you light and peace in your day. And sending warm thoughts and big hugs.

Sorry to hear, though I'm only 15 I sorta know what your going through, I've been diagnosed with common anxiety attacks in the 5th grade, it's rough but I'd take pills for them. My first prescription I had side affect too, It made me not want to eat or sleep. It was scary, and I didn't want on pills anymore. Looking back too it I'm glad they put me on different pills and I'm glad I accepted them because I don't have many attacks anymore 3 years and still running. Sometimes the second try wins? Well I hope I go much on the other things seeing as I'm only 15 I'm probably not old enough to understand. Though I hope everything turns out good with your husband your kid and your attacks and depression.


-Andrea

Thank you for all your replies.
To respond to a few questions you asked,
I do not have family who are supportive. The only family member besides my husband that I even talk to is my older sister, who unfortunately, has a very mean husband who doesn't want me around her. So I rarely see her...she actually takes Prozac. My mother turned into an alcoholic in the last year, and lives on the beach... drinks everyday and never calls me. My father is currently incarcerated (looking at big time)
So, I have really no one. No aunts and uncles.
My only concern was the fact that sometimes I'm dizzy, and sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I have blurred vision, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I think "I have a brain tumor" and then sometimes I feel like "I'm fine".
Somedays I wake up happy, excited about life...but more than those, I wake up feeling completely useless and like my head weighs more than my entire body.
I want to take an anti depressant so I can feel "happy", but I DONT WANT anymore panic attacks. Thats the reason I like anxiety medicine, because the panic attacks I simply cannot deal with. feeling sad is horrible too, but I'd rather feel sad then feel completely crazy.
I thought about post partum also, but I was wondering would that really cause dizziness and panic? I'm unfamiliar with it.
I never have energy,
I am trying to take your advice and call around about free help