Just want to talk it out
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 11:04 pm
I really don't know where to begin. I've been married for 10 years. Things have been ok. We have had our ups and downs like every other marriage. He's a descent husband. He supports me and cares for me. There was a time when he put forth no effort into our relationship, and that really hurt me. A couple years ago he started drinking heavily and did not respect me at all. I think that was the turning point for me. Since then I don't look at him the same. The past couple years he has started trying. There are times when I don't feel like trying or putting effort into our relationship anymore though. I feel bad, because I know he's trying hard, but I'm just not that into it.
I'm finishing my degree, and I have been really stressed out with school. I just recently found out that I cannot have children the natural way. So, we have to go through fertility treatments. We have been getting geared up for that, and then we found out that I need to have more tests. So, there is a chance that fertility won't work for us. My life really isn't that bad, but yet I feel miserable. It's gradually getting worse. I know that my lack of not being able to share my feelings with others does not help. I cry A LOT, and just want to be alone. I never really noticed how much I enjoy being alone until my husband started traveling. I'm not suicidal, but there are nights when I actually pray that something bad will happen to me so I can get out of my life. I really don't want to take medications to get myself through this or to mask the problem.
Is this a stage in life that a lot of people go through? How can I jump start myself back into the happy person that I used to be? Will different medications help me "jump start" myself back to being normal?
Thanks for "listening"
I'm finishing my degree, and I have been really stressed out with school. I just recently found out that I cannot have children the natural way. So, we have to go through fertility treatments. We have been getting geared up for that, and then we found out that I need to have more tests. So, there is a chance that fertility won't work for us. My life really isn't that bad, but yet I feel miserable. It's gradually getting worse. I know that my lack of not being able to share my feelings with others does not help. I cry A LOT, and just want to be alone. I never really noticed how much I enjoy being alone until my husband started traveling. I'm not suicidal, but there are nights when I actually pray that something bad will happen to me so I can get out of my life. I really don't want to take medications to get myself through this or to mask the problem.
Is this a stage in life that a lot of people go through? How can I jump start myself back into the happy person that I used to be? Will different medications help me "jump start" myself back to being normal?
Thanks for "listening"