Again.

[AndreaCoe]

At the pit of my troubles one more I lie in anguish as I wonder about how I will deal with life any longer. The only thing that troubles me, the most is everyone i know tries to call themselves my freinds, and they deceive me push me around and they think i dont have any other feeling than happy. Oh but a fake smile and a coffee a day bottles the troubles away? right,. The pain i feel slowly eats at my heart that has already shriveled up into a prune like shape cold as day. Here I am again another birthday will soon come and go. I dread the day i become 15. April 30th that cursed day. Every year i have LOW hopes for my birthday and everyyear it gets worse. Since my dad has recently been diagnosed with MS and his wife left him weeks before, and! he cant walk. i half to get a job and send him money so he can stay in a house. Yet again loss of a childhood. So young so depressed people say as they truly see me. A shame it must be ive heard. In the happiest of people the deepest part of their heart lies their compressed emotions Sad, angrey, hurt. Mine roar out everyonce in a while like a untamed beast. one that if not controlled can hurt myself... or others. I need help, i know this though. who can help me. my own mother shuts out the fact that im depressed. therefore I will not receive help. i fear i will be like this the rest of my sorrow filled childhood and cry everytime i think about it.

[Obayan]

Have you tried talking to the school counselor? It might help.

[AndreaCoe]

i have and.. they called child services on my step dad it didnt help.