Being The Failure

[Ijustcantdeal]

I don't know why I feel this way or where this even began but, I feel as if I'm unworthy of anything. I feel as if I don't look up to par as my peers I feel as if I'm not as smart as my peers and it hurts. I feel so lost and alone and I don't even know why. I haven't told my mother of this because the last time I was depressed she sent me to a therapist and even though it helped I felt horrible because every time she looked at me I felt disgraced. I mean I felt bad because my mother has this child, this defective child that can't do anything right. I don't go to therapy anymore because I told my mother I didn't need it anymore but, I still always feel that tugging feeling of doubt and self loathing.

[Understandable]

Hey There! ^_^

As I read what you wrote, I need to say is that you are a worthy person. It takes a lot of courage to say what's on your mind and how you feel to let others know.

Everyone is not perfect but we are in our own ways. That's why never compare yourself to anyone else. You're perfect the way you are, on the inside and out.

When your mother looks at you, you feel as if you do not reach her expectations right? The feeling of not being wanted by her. Yes, it's a painful feeling but it can go away! Endure the pain for now. You'll need to become more than what she thinks you cannot be. If you truly love her, do it for her. But first you must love yourself and do it for yourself.

Have a goal or more for the future ahead. Plan to see how long it'll take to achieve those goals. It will not be done right away, that's why you'll have steps in between to reach your goals. One step at a time.

Let me tell you something if you don't mind. In life, we all experience on being sad and down. It's painful and a sad feeling. But keep in mind that everyone will get their happiness one day. It is either your decision to keep strong day by day and endure the pain until this happiness comes to you. We will not know when this happiness will come, but we will know what the happiness is because it will come to us. You will experience this, I promise.

Stay strong friend!

-Understandable

[myhauger]

I understand how you feel because most of my life I've felt like a failure and like am worthless and unworhty of anything. You are worthy and you are special. Remember that always.