Depression Understood Forums

MY PRIVATE PART DIED An old man, Kurt, was living in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong, 'Yes, Nurse Tracy ,' said Kurt. 'My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.' Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and ...

A little American Indian boy asked his father, the big chief and medicine man of the tribe, 'Father, why is it that we always have long names, while the white men have shorter names like Bill , Tex or Sam?' His father replied, 'My son, our names represent a symbol, a sign, or a poem for our culture ...

I need a favor!! My neighbor has a puppy he's giving away (FREE!). It's a Dachshund, it's house broken, and it's great with kids. He's giving it away because his wife says the dog 'stares' at her when she is undressing , and that gives her the 'Heebie Jeebies'. I think she is just weird ! If you're ...

> The testicles of a Texas midget hurt and ached almost all the time. > > The midget went to the doctor and told him about his problem. > The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would have a look. The > midget dropped his pants. The doctor stood him up onto the examining > table, > and started ...

HOPE THIS MAKES YOU SMILE THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD Well, it's shit ... that's right, sh it! Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language. Consider: You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or have shit for brains. With a little effort, you can get your shit together,...

this one may bee too much and apologize, but unfortunately true IF I BREAK INTO YOUR HOUSE > > Let's say I break into your > house > A lady wrote the best letter in the > Editorials in ages!!! It explains things > better than all the baloney you hear on TV. > Her point: > Recently large demonstratio...

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding... Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago...

> FACTS TO PONDER : > > > (A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is > 700,000. > > > (B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians > > > per year are > > > 120,000. > > > (Calculation) Accidental deaths per physician > > > is > > > 0.171 > > > Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of > > > Health Human Se...

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolat...

Always remember....


No matter what situations life throws at you...



No matter how long and treacherous your journey may seem...



Remember, there is a light at the end of the tunnel...

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DOG FOR SALE!! Even if you don't own a dog at present, you'll appreciate the efforts of this owner to sell her dog. Read the sales pitch! Dog for sale! http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e316/ShadowWlf2k5/free_dog.jpg * Free to good home. * Excellent guard dog. * Owner cannot afford to feed him anymo...

The Polite way to Pee During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question: "If you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" Michael said, "Just a minu...

A pharmacist walks into his store to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. He asks the blonde clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?" The blonde clerk responds, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I...

MY PIGGY BANK AFTER FILLING MY CAR UP YESTERDAY!!