Magnetic poetry

Poetry, short stories, paintings, photography, songs – art of all genres.

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lisalou
Posts: 722
Joined: Thu Oct 01, 2009 1:48 pm
Location: Brighton, England

Magnetic poetry

Postby lisalou » Sat Dec 26, 2009 4:31 pm

Have been having great fun playing with my favourite xmas present, the magnetic poetry set i asked for from mark, loads of words on little individual magnets that you can arrange into whatever your imagination conjures up...here is today's effort:

In the red seeping of morning
The clouds bleed their poison over me
The steam of my warm breath lingers in the air
Haunting like ghosts,
Translucent and vast as eternity
Then melting into nothing like old kisses.
I remember how your cut flowers died slowly
Prisoners in glass, decaying
You too looking into your afterlife
That secret universe

TackingIntoTheWind
Posts: 1060
Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:35 am
Location: South Wales

Postby TackingIntoTheWind » Tue Jan 05, 2010 12:09 pm

You do seem to have a gift for poetry. it's relatively rare for me to respond to poetry, I'm more of a prose person. But, I do like this.

lisalou
Posts: 722
Joined: Thu Oct 01, 2009 1:48 pm
Location: Brighton, England

Postby lisalou » Tue Jan 05, 2010 2:57 pm

Thank you very much, you are my greatest fan (probably only!)

Here's what's been going on on my fridge door this week:

I wake to a day cold as steel
The blue sky devoured by concrete clouds
Glassy grass stiff with morning ice
The perfume of flowers long faded away
This world throbs like a cut which will not heal
A slow ferociousness eats up all life
I try to ask for forgiveness but my words die
They linger on my lips foolishly
They will rot in the air as this day melts to night
And the dark that kills time seeps back in


Mark marvels how I manage to make the words into such miserable poems. ah, we depressives have the knack... maybe i need to buy an additional kit that contains words such as 'bunny' 'chocolate' 'twinkle' 'fluffy' and 'smile'. sure I could still turn it in a bloodbath though...!

TackingIntoTheWind
Posts: 1060
Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:35 am
Location: South Wales

Postby TackingIntoTheWind » Wed Jan 06, 2010 11:47 am

Seriously, I am impressed by your abilty to: ( 1 ) Express yourself in terms of poetry, as I can't " do " poetry at all. I can express myself quite well in prose, although I can tend to need quite a length of expression to " nail down " what I'm trying to say. ( Could be you've noticed that? " Blushes in self-awareness! " )
( 2 ) Express yourself in terms that I can understand and resonate with. Most poetry just goes over my head! Eg: Keats and Wordsworth just go over my head completely, I'm afraid. If Wordsworth was by himself and saw some daffodils why can't he just say that? Why do we get a whole production-number about a guy by himself finding some flowers? What's the big deal!? And Keat's " Ode to a Grecian Urn " He took the time to record his feelings about old pot! Well, that really changed my life. What's the point? What am I meant to take away from this?! I have an old kettle, but I don't write poetry about it!!!!
But, I like this poem. I can identify with the feelings in it. Eg " This world throbs like a cut that will not heal. " I so often feel like this in my workplace. So much of what happens and is ordained by " Management " is poorly thought-out, poorly implemented and devoted mainly to cutting corners and cutting jobs. I can't help feeling that it shouldn't be like this, and then I so often have to work at not being wound up by these feelings of frustration Other people seem to be able to deal better with the situation, albeit with resignation and a weary cynicism! But, I can't help expecting better of " our Lords and Masters ", I expect them to be better, wiser, and kinder than they are. And then, I'm always disappointed when once more we drop the ball as a corporate body. )
Have you ever listened to any songs by Suzanne Vega? I love the combination of her music and her gift for imagery.

lisalou
Posts: 722
Joined: Thu Oct 01, 2009 1:48 pm
Location: Brighton, England

Postby lisalou » Wed Jan 06, 2010 2:19 pm

I have Suzanne Vega's Greatest Hits actually. I have always liked the song 'Tom's Diner'.

I know how frustrating the world of business can be. I worked in Customer Services for AmEx once (I only lasted a few months!) and it was one of the things that kickstarted possibly the worse bout of depression I've ever had. I get very frustrated with big companies and money-making and bureaucracy. I used to take great pleasure in crediting back money to virtually anyone who had a valid excuse for being late with a payment or giving compensation to customers who'd been having a long and bloody battle getting anywhere with the company. I also got fired from a call centre on about my third day for being overheard describing them as 'corporate b*****d scum'!!! I'm a right little anarchist, me.....!

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crystalgaze
Posts: 2511
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 10:11 pm
Location: USA

Postby crystalgaze » Tue Feb 02, 2010 8:27 am

(((((((( Lisa ))))))))))))

Yes, as Tacking said, you do seem to have a gift! Keep at it!


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