Feel like nobody cares.
Nobody wants me here.
Feel completely alone.
Had enough.
Reached my breaking point.
I need and want some support and some comfort. Please?
Need a listening ear.
Feeling at my lowest (Triggering)
Moderators: windsong, BlueGobi, Moderators, Astrid
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CrazyLady17
Feeling at my lowest (Triggering)
Well the title says all really.....
Feel like nobody cares.
Nobody wants me here.
Feel completely alone.
Had enough.
Reached my breaking point.
I need and want some support and some comfort. Please?
Need a listening ear.
Feel like nobody cares.
Nobody wants me here.
Feel completely alone.
Had enough.
Reached my breaking point.
I need and want some support and some comfort. Please?
Need a listening ear.
Last edited by CrazyLady17 on Mon Dec 16, 2013 11:50 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Attention
K, well, I'm losing the thread a bit. So here's your last message.
I'm wondering who it is you want gone.
There is no one here that wants you gone. On the contrary. I think this is a good place to be.
Responses can take a little while. Many people are at work and responding as they get the chance. But we do want to more about your life (yes you do have one) and your struggles.
By the way, I know you want help and comfort. I'd like to see you get some. But people are reading your posts and your helping others simply by posting. You are making a difference. You are important.
Frame
I'm wondering who it is you want gone.
There is no one here that wants you gone. On the contrary. I think this is a good place to be.
Lady wrote:More like " I hate her, I want her gone"!!!
I'm not wanted an never ever will be let's face it.
I'm a screwed up bitch Sad Sad
I have no friends and no life!!
My depression has taken over and I've given up.
_________________
Live life to the max
Never say never
Never give up.
My scars tell the real story.
Responses can take a little while. Many people are at work and responding as they get the chance. But we do want to more about your life (yes you do have one) and your struggles.
By the way, I know you want help and comfort. I'd like to see you get some. But people are reading your posts and your helping others simply by posting. You are making a difference. You are important.
Frame
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CrazyLady17
Huh?
Thank you for you're reply frame..
I want her gone?- meaning I want this depressed me to go!!
Everyone on here wants me to go, it's true I know it is. I have this horrible gut feeling and I'm getting pushed aside and left as always. I may as well just leave, before I hurt anyone or before I get hurt
My struggles- well my story says all...
And to be honest I don't want to repeat.
But two months ago my best friend committed suicide and I was the one who found her dead on her bathroom floor. I blame myself.
I have flashbacks and I have nightmare about that day.
I miss her so much.
Since then my depression has gotten so bad.
I've stopped eating properly and I'm having to trouble sleeping at night. I feel so worthless.
I'm not wanted and I never will.
Thank you for you're reply frame..
I want her gone?- meaning I want this depressed me to go!!
Everyone on here wants me to go, it's true I know it is. I have this horrible gut feeling and I'm getting pushed aside and left as always. I may as well just leave, before I hurt anyone or before I get hurt
My struggles- well my story says all...
And to be honest I don't want to repeat.
But two months ago my best friend committed suicide and I was the one who found her dead on her bathroom floor. I blame myself.
I have flashbacks and I have nightmare about that day.
I miss her so much.
Since then my depression has gotten so bad.
I've stopped eating properly and I'm having to trouble sleeping at night. I feel so worthless.
I'm not wanted and I never will.
I'm not completely certain what your expecting or, perhaps more important, how often. I'm checking the site as often as I can. And I am by far the most proliferate member. I'm sorry your not getting the attention you need.
But I wouldn't wait for a moderator, because I am the moderator. I know that your in pain, and I know it's difficult to talk about; but if you can talk more I think it will both make you feel better and will urge others to share with you. Keep in mind that people here are from all over the world and so will be posting at odd hours that they can get to the site.
Many people posting have families they care for and many also are dealing with depression here but hiding it in every day life. So actually getting to post here, while a helpful relief, is only possible a few hours a day.
Any way I hope we can help you through this. We probably won't be your only resource.
But I wouldn't wait for a moderator, because I am the moderator. I know that your in pain, and I know it's difficult to talk about; but if you can talk more I think it will both make you feel better and will urge others to share with you. Keep in mind that people here are from all over the world and so will be posting at odd hours that they can get to the site.
Many people posting have families they care for and many also are dealing with depression here but hiding it in every day life. So actually getting to post here, while a helpful relief, is only possible a few hours a day.
Any way I hope we can help you through this. We probably won't be your only resource.
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CrazyLady17
Trigger
What more do you want me to say?!!!
I've attempted suicide in the past and it failed? I have had very bad urges to hurt myself before?
What do you want me to say?
I'm in real pain and suffering loads, but nobody seems to give a damn. I may as well not be here.
More people decide to reply to others but leave me aside.
Why not wait for a modarator?
Why can't I wait for one?
How are you one if you only been a memeber since June?
Yeah I know, but still get left out
Do you know how hard it is?
Watching people get replies and I get nothing but more depressed?
My family aren't so supportive- it's hard to talk them.
And support worker- well she can't always speak with me, so I have nobody!!
This site was my only hope.
Frame- do you understand how hard it is to try and "fit" in?
I've attempted suicide in the past and it failed? I have had very bad urges to hurt myself before?
What do you want me to say?
I'm in real pain and suffering loads, but nobody seems to give a damn. I may as well not be here.
More people decide to reply to others but leave me aside.
Why not wait for a modarator?
Why can't I wait for one?
How are you one if you only been a memeber since June?
Yeah I know, but still get left out
Do you know how hard it is?
Watching people get replies and I get nothing but more depressed?
My family aren't so supportive- it's hard to talk them.
And support worker- well she can't always speak with me, so I have nobody!!
This site was my only hope.
Frame- do you understand how hard it is to try and "fit" in?
I'm glad you've been reading lady. It's good to check the dates too.
Yes, sometimes people chime right in. But sometimes it takes days. There are some no one has responded to.
But no that's not quite what I meant about fitting in; and no I don't mean with you. This is a life line and a resource that doesn't always feel like a life line or a resource. If I fit in with my family or my friends growing up I probably wouldn't be depressed and wouldn't be here. It's not that people here aren't worthy; they are, you are. But we don't go seeking depressed people if we aren't depressed.
If I fit in at any of my colleges, in any of my jobs, with any of my clients; I probably wouldn't be a financial disaster and I wouldn't be depressed and I wouldn't be here. That doesn't make me a failure (but it does give me experience required to play one on TV) and I'm sorry if you don't feel I have what it takes to be a moderator. I think I've been pretty moderate so far.
Yes, I guess it's fine, you can wait for a moderator if you like. Reminds of a response I made earlier this week about waiting. I hadn't mentioned it yet but it got me thinking about waiting; how there different kinds of waiting, different ways to wait.
Peace;
Frame
Yes, sometimes people chime right in. But sometimes it takes days. There are some no one has responded to.
But no that's not quite what I meant about fitting in; and no I don't mean with you. This is a life line and a resource that doesn't always feel like a life line or a resource. If I fit in with my family or my friends growing up I probably wouldn't be depressed and wouldn't be here. It's not that people here aren't worthy; they are, you are. But we don't go seeking depressed people if we aren't depressed.
If I fit in at any of my colleges, in any of my jobs, with any of my clients; I probably wouldn't be a financial disaster and I wouldn't be depressed and I wouldn't be here. That doesn't make me a failure (but it does give me experience required to play one on TV) and I'm sorry if you don't feel I have what it takes to be a moderator. I think I've been pretty moderate so far.
Yes, I guess it's fine, you can wait for a moderator if you like. Reminds of a response I made earlier this week about waiting. I hadn't mentioned it yet but it got me thinking about waiting; how there different kinds of waiting, different ways to wait.
Peace;
Frame
i am sorry you are hurting so much, it would have been devastating seeing your friend suicided.
i had to see my neighbour like that who i looked up to , so it is not a nice feeling .
we do all care on here but things are going on in our lives which do not make it convenient to post often.
Frame is doing a great job but he also works so a response may not come immediately.
i hope you are feeling a little bit better today, remember i care and so does everyone else.
take care
i had to see my neighbour like that who i looked up to , so it is not a nice feeling .
we do all care on here but things are going on in our lives which do not make it convenient to post often.
Frame is doing a great job but he also works so a response may not come immediately.
i hope you are feeling a little bit better today, remember i care and so does everyone else.
take care
Hi Crazylady
Our mods are chosen based on care and support shown. Unfortunately mods aren't able to respond to every post but they do care and do the best they can.
As far as not getting responses. Sometimes responses come and go, what you have mentioned here is a subject that is hard for people to call about without triggering them. Or its possible they feel like they can't help because they haven't been in similar circumstances. That doesn't mean they don't care.
Sometimes however accusing people of not caring can have the opposite effect of what you are wanting.
I'm truly sorry for the loss of your friend. There was nothing you could do to have prevent that since your friend had made up their mind. Your friend could have chosen to seek help, find a place like this, to talk to a doctor, and didn't.
You have a chance though to seek help. You can seek grief counseling to help you come to terms with what you are feeling. You can seek treatment on how to deal with these flashbacks.
I know you are struggling right now but it can get easier.
Our mods are chosen based on care and support shown. Unfortunately mods aren't able to respond to every post but they do care and do the best they can.
As far as not getting responses. Sometimes responses come and go, what you have mentioned here is a subject that is hard for people to call about without triggering them. Or its possible they feel like they can't help because they haven't been in similar circumstances. That doesn't mean they don't care.
Sometimes however accusing people of not caring can have the opposite effect of what you are wanting.
I'm truly sorry for the loss of your friend. There was nothing you could do to have prevent that since your friend had made up their mind. Your friend could have chosen to seek help, find a place like this, to talk to a doctor, and didn't.
You have a chance though to seek help. You can seek grief counseling to help you come to terms with what you are feeling. You can seek treatment on how to deal with these flashbacks.
I know you are struggling right now but it can get easier.
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CrazyLady17
Sorry
Hi guys,
Will answer all three posts in this one....
I'm so sorry okay?
I didn't mean to offerened or upset any of you, you know that right? That wasn't my intention at all, and I'm sorry for that
It's just yes I came here to get at least a little comfort and I thought people would understand why I feel so desparte to get replies.... I'm suffering major depression here, and yes it's all down to my grief but also down to things like college, money, relationships with my parents etc....
Been kicked out twice because of my depression, I literally have nobody to turn to when I feel at my lowest. And it's horrible.
Finding out my best friend had killed herself was tragic, it was like a horrible nightmare and I wanted to wake up from it. Knowing now it's real and this is reality it's hit me pretty hard and I can't stop thinking I'm the one I blame for her death. I'm the guilty one- I should be punished right?...
I know- I have had grief counselling in the past for other losses it didn't work
Today I'm feeling the same as yesterday really....
But feeling even more depressed and feel like I've reached my breaking point.
Will answer all three posts in this one....
I'm so sorry okay?
I didn't mean to offerened or upset any of you, you know that right? That wasn't my intention at all, and I'm sorry for that
It's just yes I came here to get at least a little comfort and I thought people would understand why I feel so desparte to get replies.... I'm suffering major depression here, and yes it's all down to my grief but also down to things like college, money, relationships with my parents etc....
Been kicked out twice because of my depression, I literally have nobody to turn to when I feel at my lowest. And it's horrible.
Finding out my best friend had killed herself was tragic, it was like a horrible nightmare and I wanted to wake up from it. Knowing now it's real and this is reality it's hit me pretty hard and I can't stop thinking I'm the one I blame for her death. I'm the guilty one- I should be punished right?...
I know- I have had grief counselling in the past for other losses it didn't work
Today I'm feeling the same as yesterday really....
But feeling even more depressed and feel like I've reached my breaking point.
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