I need to just disappear!

Feelings and emotions regarding depression, anxiety and other health issues.

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Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Oct 11, 2016 8:09 am

I need to just disappear!

Postby DylanK » Tue Oct 11, 2016 6:46 pm

I can't take this anymore. I feel so unwanted, unloved, everything. No one likes me, even when they don't know me. I've been bullied my whole life, just for having a deformed ear. I can't go out anymore unless I am with someone I trust. The only time I go out is when I go to group and even they hate me there. They ignore me, they don't include me in anything they do, as soon as I try to join in they just push me aside like I was never there.

I have made plans to end it all, I want to, I just can't. I am a failure, I can't even end my life properly. Either I tell someone I am doing it and they stop me or I just can't.

This year has been nothing but rubbish for me. I got diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, my birthday was ruined because my nan and granddad had a fight, then my granddad had to go to hospital, now I have just gotten pneumonia. I think its time to just go. Leave this cruel world and finally be happy.

I can't be happy on this earth no more, I can't even be myself. I want to be a boy, (I was born a female) but when I came out my mum refused to accept me. Now I just sit here in the wrong body crying every night. I just want to turn the on/off button off on my life. I just want to quit. Nothing ever goes right for me. I need help but I don't think anyone can help me with my messed up head. People think they know me, they don't. I want to tell people what goes on in my head but I know they will just get freaked out or just leave. People think its suicide, but its not. It's worse than that!

Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 2:09 pm

Re: I need to just disappear!

Postby Sunshine555 » Fri Oct 14, 2016 2:28 pm

I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. People can be cruel when we may look different because of a body part. It makes no sense but that is sadly how life is. :( I was teased as a young person because of my lips and my butt. It was hard growing up dealing with mean people. You are important in this life! You are God's child and wonderfully made in spite of any flaws......we all have them. Even with the "perfect" face or body shape that we see on models, most of the time it's just an imagine that was created perfectly with technology. Have you sought to visit a doctor to get help or counsel? You have a purpose for being here. Sometimes we go throught things to be a help to others. I tell my daugthers all the time that if people don't want to be aroud them to move on. There is someone for everyone. I prayed and asked God to sent me the right people to be around. I am sending you this link that I believe will help. Hey and if you just want to talk, I'll listen. :)


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