Help!! I'm about to commit suicide!! ;(

Feelings and emotions regarding depression, anxiety and other health issues.

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Deep Blue Sea
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Help!! I'm about to commit suicide!! ;(

Postby Deep Blue Sea » Mon Sep 22, 2008 1:10 am

:cry: Help me please.. I feel like committing suicide. I have no F body no friends. never had any sexual relationships nothing.. I don't know what to do with my life anymore, I feel like I don't want to be alive anymore.. :cry: I'm thinking of jumping off a highway at one of the stops on the platform or jump in front of a speeding train.. I feel so much like S

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Warmsoul/Jeanie13
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Postby Warmsoul/Jeanie13 » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:04 pm

Please seek medical help asap. We are not professionals and can not assist you.

If you want to talk about this, we will do our best to reply. IF you are suicidal, again, seek proffessinal help.

Emotional_77
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Postby Emotional_77 » Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:17 pm

I had to delete that last post. that was not called for. We are here as a support for people who have mental illnesses as we do but we can not do anything to help with someone who is suicidal but for them to get extra help themselves. Im sorry.

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hey-its-ok
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Postby hey-its-ok » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:13 pm

hey deep blue sea, there is a lot more to life than you can see at the moment, its just this period of time that you are having this feeling. When you are so depressed, you tend not to see the beautiful things in life, but there are lots to live for, trust me :wink: Things will definately change for the better, friends will come, you just have to pull yourself together and things will change for the better. You need to find someone to talk to, a councellor is good, why don't you try speaking to one? There is no harm. Try various approaches, but trust me... things will change for the better, you just have to pull through this period of time, let me give you a big hug!! Come on... cheer up... give me a smile :D i know you don't feel like it, but give it to me anyway... humour me :D just smile for me, ok? Just once? :D See i'm already smiling as i write to you... asking you to smile got me smiling :D hey, really, on a more serious tone, go talk to a councellor... or just do something with your life at the moment, maybe go on a holiday or something, go eat chocolate icecream (this works for me ALL the time)... you know, really, i'm serious, listen to me, how you are feeling now is just temporary, and this feeling WILL go away, things WILL change, you just have to pull through this... you won't regret it, trust me :D hey, come on, let me give you another hug! :lol:

macey
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Depression

Postby macey » Wed Sep 24, 2008 2:21 am

Hi, I am new to this site. I hope I am getting through. I have been kinda down lately. I have been hunting for a job. Laid off since January. My former employer retired. My husband died and the person treating me to help me through died on August 12th. My immediate family is of no support. My youngest is in college. My oldest has a family and works round the clock. My sisters and brother seem to have there own lives and do give a shit about my life. Pardon my language. I feel like the life is just sucked out of me and have no purpose. When I do work I run into problems with others. They don't accept me as I am. Its a cruel world. Can't wait to be on the other side with my husband and friends etc...but still wish my life could turn for the better but there is no hope right now. Help!
Macey

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Warmsoul/Jeanie13
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Postby Warmsoul/Jeanie13 » Wed Sep 24, 2008 10:13 am

Hi macey,

Welcome to the forums. Please note there is a depression chat room connected with this forum.

There are many supportive and caring people there to talk with.

Please give it a try, it has been such a help to me, to many.

Warmie 8)

SoulInDespair
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Postby SoulInDespair » Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:26 pm

I'm sorry I didn't see this till today. Deep Blue Sea. I hope you're doing better today. I know how you feel. I really truly do. I've been fighting depression and feelings like of suicide since I was fifteen. I'm fifty-one now. Everyday it's a struggle just to want to stay alive. To continue on even though everything seems hopeless. You don't know how many times I've wanted to do exactly what you want to do. Sometimes, when I'm severely depressed and crossing the street I pray that a car will come and hit and kill me. That's how little I care sometimes. Sometimes, I think about hanging myself in my apartment but I don't do any of those things.

You know why? Because death is permanent. There's no way to undo what you've done to yourself. There is also no gaurentee that you'd be successful. You could end up permanently paralized and still miserable. I'm not trying to shock you, just inform.

Hey, I don't have anyone who cares about whether I'm alive or dead either. But I know suicide isn't the answer. The people who don't care about me now aren't going to care more or feel guilty because I'm dead. Don't do it to get even. Don't do it to escape the pain either. You're talking to a veteran of the eternal struggle against giving into the desire to give kill myself. As hard and painful as my life is, I would rather choose to fight then commit suicide. Life over death. I bet you're a fighter too. Think of one reason to live and hold onto that. I'm not a religious person but do believe in God and Jesus and I know suicide is a sin. I hold onto that fact to help keep me alive because when the day is done I want to see heaven and I won't get there if I commit suicide.

I'm not trying to shove religion done your throat because as I said before I'm not a religious person but my point is this is my one thing to keep me alive. You must have at least one good thing in your life to keep you going. Stop. Think. What is that one thing? Hold it close to you. Let it help you get thru to the next minute, the next hour, the next day.

Don't give up the good fight Deep Blue. As one warrior to another, I know you're tough enough not to let this beat you. (((hugs))) and healing vibes.

Macy. I'm very sorry about your husband and the lost of your support person. I know it's hard to continue on when you've lost so much and you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. My siblings don't give a shit about me either so I can relate. Don't give up. I'm glad you're here. You know why? Because you've already helped me. Here it is Sunday, late afternoon and tomorrow I have to go back to work. I dread work. I get depressed and have anxiety attacks and sometimes on Sunday nights I don't sleep at all. But I came here and I talk to you and Deep Blue Sea and now I feel better because I know I'm not alone out here.

You're not alone. You have me and WarmSoul and hey-its-ok thinking about you and wishing you well. Hang in there. It's going to be okay. I know it is. It has to. I'm in the same boat with you. (((hugs))) and healing vibes.

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xn728
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Re: Help!! I'm about to commit suicide!! ;(

Postby xn728 » Thu Apr 30, 2009 3:52 pm

Deep Blue Sea wrote::cry: Help me please.. I feel like committing suicide. I have no F body no friends. never had any sexual relationships nothing.. I don't know what to do with my life anymore, I feel like I don't want to be alive anymore.. :cry: I'm thinking of jumping off a highway at one of the stops on the platform or jump in front of a speeding train.. I feel so much like S
you need to get help with this i know what its like .ive been like this for 30 odd years now ,if you take that step how do you know what awaits you ,were in hell now ,so it cant be that ,is it heaven with fluffy clouds and an old man with a white beard .i dont know .it could be the place were the depression is pushing you towards ,you need to turn around and show it now that you wont go there .i have done this many times ,dont fight the depression ,you must learn to live with it ,it will turn you inside out ,steel your emotions ,it wants you to give in ,and then its won ,oh my god i have cryed ,ive pushed my face into the earth to hide my screams ,and will again ,put i wont give ,we are all your freinds here ,write and we will listen ,reach out and we will catch your fall ,,,xn728,,,,,,,,,,

jer
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Joined: Mon May 25, 2009 5:05 pm
Location: Texas

Postby jer » Tue Jun 02, 2009 7:30 pm

Hi Deepbluesea,

where are you. Hope you are still around. Havent heard from you in a while.
Hope you are doing fine.

thanks

j0hny1987
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Postby j0hny1987 » Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:08 pm

u're no alone. I got this feelings everytime. even im my dream. It's weird feeling i know. Just remember u are not alone. Share and express ur feeling here. Everything gonna be ok. When there is rain, there will be sunshine also . Night will turn into day. Dark will turn into light.

Monty
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Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:44 pm
Location: Canada

Postby Monty » Thu Jun 11, 2009 3:21 pm

Like j0hny1987's tag line.

It is so true that we are still all in there fighting. We will not let the depression beat us.

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crystalgaze
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Chord [Possible Trigger]

Postby crystalgaze » Mon Jun 29, 2009 4:20 pm

POSSIBLE TRIGGER

This is an old topic/thread, but it strikes a chord with me because I have been there & I have done it. PLEASE DON'T DO IT. I really hope you & anyone else who comes across this thread haven't done it & don't do it. From having seen/done it 1sthand, it's not worth it [at least not to me].

I really do hope the original poster is okay. If you're having a moment, go get some help, even if it's just so that someone is with you. That's where I went wrong.

My intent below is not to preach or offend anyone. It's to reveal the ugliness of the attempt + a botched attempt. Hopefully that side of the coin will be understood; I lived it.


What I Learned

#0 Your life is worth something, even if you can't see it now, it doesn't seem that way or you don't think it is. It just is.

#1 There is a possible chance that you can botch it & be worse off than if you just simply had not attempted it in the 1st place. [I'm lucky I'm not confined to a wheelchair!]

Surviving & the questions I later asked myself, dealing with myself as being a sort of walking undead & what I faced afterward made me wish I had not done it to begin with.

There was value in the situation as bad as it was because I hit a low & the low that happened to be mine was the one talked about in this post.

#2 You really must hold yourself dear & not expect, rely on or think that anyone else is going to/has to do that for you. I mean, it's really nice if that happens, but that has not been my luck & I'm not going to lie: It can be very difficult. That's a sort of sad statement to make, but that is the climate of our society [US] today for the most part.

The other thing is: Whom do you trust, if not yourself?

#3 The damage that's done is irreversible & one of the hardest things to do, if you survive, is to look at the people who got hurt as a result of your deed. Even if you don't have to look at them, they're still going to be hurt & even if you don't have any one, you will be the 1 hurt. The point is that somebody is going to get hurt.

#4 I'm not sure what can compare to being locked up in a hospital where you can't go outside as you wish. You might as well as call it a prison. That's one thing that could happen. That's what happened to me. I was lucky I was even released & I was lucky the hospital didn't ship me off to the floor so many people have gone where they just disappear & no one sees them again.

That happened to one of the patients who was there when I was there. Apparently on that floor, you are locked in your room, & there are cameras every where you turn.

#5 My coping mechanism was badly broken/worn out/eroded. If you can strengthen it, do so. As much as it can be a pain or exhausting, it's better to be a fighter & to do your best to go out & grab/claim your happiness. It's actually something you put effort into acquiring/being.

#6 While my action was not a cry for help, as so many experts on this claim, I can honestly say now, "Just don't do it. Please, please, please, PLEASE just don't do it." Go get emergency help. There will be someone to help you & if you go & the people don't provide you with any help, then say to F with them & go some place else.

It is just much worse when you attempt/do it & because you don't have your faculties together at the moment, any thing can be done to you.

That's exactly what happens. Oh yeah.... The hospital where I went, the people were not equipped to deal with patients like me exactly. The medics thought I could not hear or understand what they were saying, even though they were standing right over/next to me. As out of it as I was, I understood & heard all of what they said. They were so not nice.

I was so out of it that money was stolen from me, my glasses I wear to see clearly were left behind, pictures were taken of me nude by the medics & I can't possibly recover & can't fight a hospital for them. I vomited all over the place & didn't even realize I had done so. They try to get you to sign papers when you're not EVEN aware of what you'd be signing.

IT'S NOT COOL.

There is going to be someone who will walk on you, even when you're down & they're not going to give a **** or be considerate. It's just best not to put yourself in that position. There's no fighting fair.


#7 You're going to be dead + gone & that's all you're going to be. Not many people will give two hoots & you will be forgotten by most. Furthermore, the people who've wanted to see you fall will win [forever]. You have no comeback....

For all of the after effects, it's something I could have done without truthfully.


I think the biggest regret I have of my life is that I didn't learn self-defense as a kid & beat the people who bothered me when they provoked me. I might not have been in that hospital for that reason, & I might have been more resilient, as a result of the training + discipline that goes into it. However, this is all speculation.

Monty
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Postby Monty » Thu Jul 02, 2009 2:56 pm

I too have tried bringing my life to a premature end.

Totally agree with your final statement.

That if you are successful with the suicide that will mean "that they will wini". There are no do-overs with a suicide. Once you are gone that is it.


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