Feeling melancholy

[Nella]

Perhaps if I share something here, it will help...
It feels like I am in a bubble, with no one to talk to. I moved towns after my divorce and live with my family. My best friend, and the only one I feel I can talk freely to without censoring what I say, is in my old town. We only communicate via whatsapp.
I appear to be a social butterfly with dozens of friends and always laughing and chatting. The truth is, I struggle to trust people and it takes forever for me to relax and totally be at ease with someone. I want to talk about random thoughts, serious stuff, frivolous stuff, sex, God, life, whatever, without censoring.
Does anyone else feel like this? How do I get over myself and trust people?
I thought my husband was The One and yes, we talked about everything in the beginning, but once I lost trust in him, I couldn't get myself talking again.
I think it started with the fact that I cannot chat to my mom about everything - learned this behaviour from childhood, then.
I joined this forum in the hope that I can talk about stuff and it seems to help a lot. If I now can only sort out the 'disconnect from server' issues in the chatrooms, I will be a happy chappy.