Feelings and emotions regarding depression, anxiety and other health issues.
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Hi. So I usually post about depression but I decided that I could really use some advice on this. It was pointed out to me by a close friend a few months ago that I'm very negative towards myself and that while I'm forgiving towards most others when it comes to me and my mistakes or what I perceive to be faults I'm harsh and frankly, hateful. So I'd been monitoring my thoughts and comments about myself and realized that she was right. For example, in a group therapy session we were asked to list three nice things about yourself and the only thing I could think of was that I kind of like my eyes. I've come to realize that I hate myself and no matter what I try, like replacing negative thoughts with something good or talking to my therapist about it nothing seems to work. I'm really hoping someone has some advice for me because I hate feeling disgusted with who I am or how I look and I'd like to just once look at myself and say that I like who I am.
I can relate with your problem I have trouble seeing any positive qualities in myself and accepting compliments. My therapist helped me to see that I'm not as bad as I think I am by getting me to realize that I uphold certain standards that are important to me in others. For example I have a really big thing for honor. They say a gentleman never kisses and tells and I've always found it very hard to not be disgusted by people who brag about their sexual exploits. Another thing I value highly is honesty, I can't stand being lied to. So things that are important to you in a friend like intelligence or a good sense of humor are probably positive aspects that you possess and I know how hard it is but you need to stop being so self critical. I personally have a tendency to compare myself to others that are much more experienced in a certain field. For example I enjoy drawing but until recently I thought I was garbage at it. People would always tell me how amazing my drawings were but I never believed them because I always compared myself to others who were better than me. One of the things that's important to realize is that life isn't a competition and everyone is better at somethings than others so don't put pressure on yourself and just stop and smell the roses every once in a while and try to appreciate life. I hope this helped in some way and also I can point out a positive quality in you right now. You're a good listener and smarter than average. Most people can't look at themselves and recognize and admit actual flaws. Plus your courageous because even with a screen between you and everyone else it still takes courage to ask for help.
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