I cannot build up the courage to ask for help.

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gruunder
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 13, 2017 2:37 pm

I cannot build up the courage to ask for help.

Postby gruunder » Mon Mar 13, 2017 2:52 pm

I already posted on reddit, though it got lost in the masses of posts so i decided to make a topic here aswell. I do not know what i hope to achieve by doing this but i just want someone to hear me, this is tearing me apart. Here is the slightly edited copy-paste from my reddit post.

I am going to be completely honest here, for a few years now actually i've been certain i have some sort of cancer. I have never been to a doctor or asked anyone or talked at all about it. Whenever anyone asks me if i'm feeling okay i tell them all i'm fine or feeling good etc..

The thing is, i noticed i had a small lump under my right armpit, i didn't think much of it as i was younger, and i thought for some reason it'd vanish somehow. But it stayed and is there still, in addition to one on my neck and one on my chest, they hurt when i touch them. An other thing that happens to me, not sure it relates though is i sometimes lose my vision and almost faint when i stand up. I think about it all the time and it has made my life quite miserable, as i can't find reasons to invest time in school work, to get in physical shape or socialise and make friends or get in a relationship with a girl.

I have constant pressure on my from my parents who expect me to do well in school. They have no idea of any of this, neither do any of my friends, it all comes crashing down at me sometimes and, i don't know what to say. I just want to scream outfor help, but i just can't do it, i do not know why.

Excuse me but f***! I don't tear up or anything like that often but just typing this out is f****** me up. I do not know what to to, at times it feels as though i'm running out of time somehow and all time i spend on people and school will be somehow wasted, not that i do much that has meaning as i mostly sit around and do nothing either watching YouTube and playing videogames. I realise i must sound like a priviliged twat, at times it feels as though i deserve it. Sorry, i can't really type more at the moment as i'm about to start crying and i don't want my parents to see me and realise something is wrong.

Helloraspberries1
Posts: 260
Joined: Wed May 25, 2016 2:11 pm

Re: I cannot build up the courage to ask for help.

Postby Helloraspberries1 » Mon Mar 13, 2017 5:15 pm

Hi there, welcome to the forums.

I'm sorry to hear what your going. I can't imagine what it must be like.

What your going through is really bad and I urgently require you to seek medical help asap!!! It's really important you talk to someone as you really need to be checked out.

I'm worried about you and how you are in yourself. I'm concerned you haven't told anyone about this but I understand your reasons why.

These things your experiencing really need to be checked out with a doctor especially. Would it help going with someone? A really good friend or going there on your own by yourself ok as you don't want anyone to know? You do need to see someone.

Please don't suffer in silence. It's obviously effecting your school life and relationships so please go and talk to someone. Make an appointment asap.

I'm so glad you told us on here. If you need talk to us about anything else please do. We're all here to support each other.

You can also ring The Samaritan's. They are a confidential service who listens to people who are going through distress or some emotional experience.

Please contact someone asap.

Helloraspberries

gruunder
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 13, 2017 2:37 pm

Re: I cannot build up the courage to ask for help.

Postby gruunder » Fri Mar 31, 2017 9:25 am

I did it. I went to the doctor, got it checked, was nothing more but a sebaceous gland. I feel relived now, i'm gonna remove it and get it out of my life. Thanks

Helloraspberries1
Posts: 260
Joined: Wed May 25, 2016 2:11 pm

Re: I cannot build up the courage to ask for help.

Postby Helloraspberries1 » Sat Apr 01, 2017 4:24 pm

That's great news!!! Well Done for going to the doctor. Glad you know that your reassured. When are you starting treatment?

How you feeling in yourself now you find out what it is? Do you feel better?

Are you able to talk to your family about this or friends? I know it can be hard to tell them but once they know they will also be grateful you told them so they wouldn't have to worry.

Thank You for letting us know how you got on. Please keep in touch.

Helloraspberries1


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