Scared of the future

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PianoStrings
Posts: 10
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2016 2:09 pm

Scared of the future

Postby PianoStrings » Sun Apr 10, 2016 11:11 am

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING WITH MY LIFE.

I feel so stuck!! Right now I'm trying to revise for my GCSEs. I've been basically stuck inside for the last four months and have been stressed for two years. It doesn't help that I'm coping with anxiety and depression either.

I can't wait for this part of my life to be over. I've been working so hard that I've almost forgotten I do actually have a future. And that terrfies me. I'm really scared.

Everyone keeps telling me I'm just being a stupid teenager and I should stop worrying, but I have absolutely no idea what to do with my life- I just don't know what I want!!
I feel like I'm wasting time and I'm terrified of wasting my life or ending up unhappy. Does anyone else feel like this??

Ch0senGen
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2016 7:09 pm

Know exactly what you mean

Postby Ch0senGen » Mon Apr 11, 2016 11:16 am

I have also been through this same issue. Here is my story - I will try to keep it short. ;)

I grew up very poor and was raised by a single mother. My father was an alcoholic who cheated on my mom all the time and got another lady pregnant. :/ My Father left when I was a year and a half and when my sibling was only 3 months. He left and never came back. Needless to say they divorced. I have only met my father once.

My family had barely enough money to stay afloat. Due to our bad circumstances I had to work to help bring in money starting at about 9 years old. My mom would get jobs cleaning and painting houses. It was very stressful because we did not get paid until we finished the job. If we didn't finish on time we didn't get money to buy food and eat. It put a lot of strain on me as a child. It made me feel hopeless. I also had many relatives who thought I would become nothing. No kids wanted to be associated with me because we were poor and not at their "level".

As a teenager I became very ill for two years with a mystery illness. I was bed ridden for some time and always in horrible pain. It Turns out there was black mold in our house that had been slowly killing us for ten years. We did not have the money to repair the mold that was eating our house from the floor up so we had to give up our home. I remember one time in particular sleeping in the car with my family while my sister struggled to breath. The mold affected my memory to the point where I could not remember certain events from my childhood. This illness caused me to start college two years later so I was quite behind.

It was a very depressing time for me because I did not think I would be able to have a future. I felt that even though I was very young that I would never be able to have a good life. I felt that I had lost everything. I had no idea what I wanted to do. I felt lost. I felt abandoned by all of my relatives who thought I was faking my illness and who abandoned us when we lost our house. It was horrible. This is the time in which I became very depressed and didn't feel like life was worth living. I was very deceived thinking this. I had believed a lie - a lie which almost took my life. We were cleaning a building and I locked myself in the office. I didn't want to die I just wanted the pain to stop. I wanted the agony and depression to stop. While I was in there my mom came looking for me. She said that the Lord had told her what I was trying to do. God saved my life because when I heard my mom calling my name I called out to her. Only her and I know this story.

Now I have a bachelors degree and I have been accepted into the masters program. I am also certified in several areas. My health is back to normal and my memories have returned slowly. I am very happy. I have a few wonderful friends who care about me and I also started my own blog.

Life does get better. I can tell you that with full certainty PianoStrings. If you have any questions feel free to ask them or message me. :)

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defeated
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Re: Scared of the future

Postby defeated » Wed Jun 08, 2016 10:30 am

PianoStrings wrote:I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING WITH MY LIFE.

I feel so stuck!! Right now I'm trying to revise for my GCSEs. I've been basically stuck inside for the last four months and have been stressed for two years. It doesn't help that I'm coping with anxiety and depression either.

I can't wait for this part of my life to be over. I've been working so hard that I've almost forgotten I do actually have a future. And that terrfies me. I'm really scared.

Everyone keeps telling me I'm just being a stupid teenager and I should stop worrying, but I have absolutely no idea what to do with my life- I just don't know what I want!!
I feel like I'm wasting time and I'm terrified of wasting my life or ending up unhappy. Does anyone else feel like this??


I'm sorry you're so stressed out :( How are you doing now? *hugs*

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defeated
Posts: 1045
Joined: Sun Jun 10, 2012 6:45 pm
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Re: Know exactly what you mean

Postby defeated » Wed Jun 08, 2016 10:42 am

Ch0senGen wrote:I have also been through this same issue. Here is my story - I will try to keep it short. ;)

I grew up very poor and was raised by a single mother. My father was an alcoholic who cheated on my mom all the time and got another lady pregnant. :/ My Father left when I was a year and a half and when my sibling was only 3 months. He left and never came back. Needless to say they divorced. I have only met my father once.

My family had barely enough money to stay afloat. Due to our bad circumstances I had to work to help bring in money starting at about 9 years old. My mom would get jobs cleaning and painting houses. It was very stressful because we did not get paid until we finished the job. If we didn't finish on time we didn't get money to buy food and eat. It put a lot of strain on me as a child. It made me feel hopeless. I also had many relatives who thought I would become nothing. No kids wanted to be associated with me because we were poor and not at their "level".

As a teenager I became very ill for two years with a mystery illness. I was bed ridden for some time and always in horrible pain. It Turns out there was black mold in our house that had been slowly killing us for ten years. We did not have the money to repair the mold that was eating our house from the floor up so we had to give up our home. I remember one time in particular sleeping in the car with my family while my sister struggled to breath. The mold affected my memory to the point where I could not remember certain events from my childhood. This illness caused me to start college two years later so I was quite behind.

It was a very depressing time for me because I did not think I would be able to have a future. I felt that even though I was very young that I would never be able to have a good life. I felt that I had lost everything. I had no idea what I wanted to do. I felt lost. I felt abandoned by all of my relatives who thought I was faking my illness and who abandoned us when we lost our house. It was horrible. This is the time in which I became very depressed and didn't feel like life was worth living. I was very deceived thinking this. I had believed a lie - a lie which almost took my life. We were cleaning a building and I locked myself in the office. I didn't want to die I just wanted the pain to stop. I wanted the agony and depression to stop. While I was in there my mom came looking for me. She said that the Lord had told her what I was trying to do. God saved my life because when I heard my mom calling my name I called out to her. Only her and I know this story.

Now I have a bachelors degree and I have been accepted into the masters program. I am also certified in several areas. My health is back to normal and my memories have returned slowly. I am very happy. I have a few wonderful friends who care about me and I also started my own blog.

Life does get better. I can tell you that with full certainty PianoStrings. If you have any questions feel free to ask them or message me. :)


Dear Ch0senGen,

Thank you so much for sharing your story. You have overcome so many struggles and despite that have achieved so much thus far. I find stories like yours inspirational to be honest. Your strength is something to be admired. I also have had health issues that have "slowed me down" in life, so I can relate. Please keep us updated on how you're doing.

Thank you :)

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CitM
Posts: 157
Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2012 12:45 pm
Location: United States

Re: Scared of the future

Postby CitM » Tue Jul 05, 2016 12:49 pm

I think its terrific you are a teenager. You are doing a teen thing too!! Of course you don't know which way to take your life right now, professionally or in other ways. I hate to tell you this, cause I don't want you to feel embarrassed, buttttt..

This is a completely normal phase of being a teanager. And it's not stupid. It is terrifying for some people.

Life is complicated right now. There are so many choices out there for people it can be overwhelming but what I would say is write down the areas that are parts of your life, including areas of uncertainty. Categorize them like boyfriends, leaving home, staying at home, go to college, not go to college, and do the pro's and cons of these different paths.

I can help a bit with some of this.
1. If you are a teen, don't worry about life time partners until you are 24 or so. As a teen, you are sorting out what you like in a significant other, and what you don't like. That's why teens tend, or should, date more than one person. Now occasionally, a few people get it right the first time, are lucky to figure that out and get married and live happily ever after. But that is a 1 in 500 event. Chances are that's not going to be you. So relax, date people, note what you like in a person, what you don't like and eventually you'll find the right one for you.
2. The market demands right now are in the following fields, medical, computer technology, pet industry (including zoos), freight industry, construction, alternative energy technologies, the art sciences and art.
3. Exercise (not talking running a marathon or anything), which includes walking, biking, tennis, volley ball, swimming, dancing, etc is necessary for your body's health. You don't have to go to a gym to get exercise. Do something fun with your friends.
4. You don't have to go to a four year college. You can make it with a H.S. diploma and a community college associate degree to start. Community colleges are the best deal in higher education right now. I'm telling you the truth. From there, you can get a job, and work for awhile, and then go for a four year degree, which won't take four years because you have two of them, or go to a two year technical school and go to work after that for a higher salary. Do NOT try to make it on a H.S. diploma onlyt at this time.
5. If you REALLY don't know what you are interested in, then I would say, still go to the community college and take a variety of courses, if you still don't know, talk to colleges and ask them if they have a Bachelors of Liberal Studies Degree. That degree encompasses 6 axis of professional degree directions, in other words, six minors, which actually might be very useful in business today.

Good luck

Rinner
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Jul 08, 2016 4:20 pm

Re: Scared of the future

Postby Rinner » Fri Jul 08, 2016 6:48 pm

Hey,

I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone! Everyone feels this way. And people telling you you're a teenager and that's why you feel this way is true; but almost everyone in their 20s feel this way too! It takes a long time to find what makes you happy and to be in a position of security. Change is scary, and making decisions is scary. I wish I would be able to tell my younger self this:
It's not "what am I going to do with my life", it's "what am I going to try next".


Don't bother thinking about what you're going to do for the rest of your life! That's way too overwhelming. And people change! You will have all new thoughts and new likes in a few years. Just think - What do you want to try next? Or what do you want to try first?

For me; I'm able to make a plan then. I can see what steps I need to take to get to that next place.

I hope this helps.


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