Does anyone get depressed from disapproval? (social anxiety)

Everyday life. How was your day?

Moderators: windsong, BlueGobi, Moderators, vince13, Maelstrom, Astrid

sundrops
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2014 7:05 am

Does anyone get depressed from disapproval? (social anxiety)

Postby sundrops » Wed Dec 10, 2014 7:16 am

I get depressed really easily and I'm pretty sure it comes from my social anxiety. Yesterday at my (new-ish) work my colleague said I could go on my break now so I assumed it was half past without checking the time, I went to grab my bag and my manager (who up until that point had been very cheerful and friendly) asked me what I was doing. I had to explain to her but she seemed annoyed and said if I'm leaving a few mins earlier I should come back few mins earlier, and if I'm alright with that then she is. It sort of came as a shock to me that she was quite sarcastic and completely different from her usual easygoing self.

It's such a tiny thing, but for some reason I don't know why, I found myself recording this exchange over in my head for ages afterwards. I got really depressed about it and kept thinking of ways I could have explained myself better, and hating the fact she might really dislike me now for this.
I think what's worse is the idea that she sees me as someone who just doesn't care about her job and tried to scrape a few mins extra break.

I feel really stupid for beating myself up and being so wound up over something so small, but it really effects me sadly. Does anybody else get this, or can relate in any way?

Thanks

User avatar
Joekababazae
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Nov 23, 2014 1:28 pm
Location: United States

Postby Joekababazae » Sun Jan 11, 2015 2:00 pm

Oh I can totally relate.

I'm extremely sensitive to criticism and rejection, anything other than near-perfect harmony eats away at me for quite some time. It could be from women or co-workers or my parents, it doesn't matter, I can't handle it at all. I'm so freaking fragile probably because I have such low self-esteem that any additional criticism just shatters me completely. So yeah, I know how you feel.

NickStokes
Posts: 53
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2015 8:25 am

Postby NickStokes » Wed Dec 23, 2015 6:03 am

It is totally normal. Nothing to be ashamed of. Just keep going!

shantyboat
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2015 4:19 pm

The voices

Postby shantyboat » Sat Dec 26, 2015 4:32 pm

I try to build a new experience, so the voices in my head can concentrate on that. Can you do a favor for someone? Work five minutes longer at something that needs to be done? The voices make mountains out of molehills. You don't deserve that.

User avatar
CitM
Posts: 157
Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2012 12:45 pm
Location: United States

Re: Does anyone get depressed from disapproval? (social anxiety)

Postby CitM » Tue Jul 05, 2016 12:59 pm

Yes.

But then what I try to do is try to honestly look at the contents of what they are saying, not maybe how they said it, and own the stuff that is mine. Some people don't know how to give constructive criticism. But just because they word it poorly doesn't mean it won't help you become aware of a pattern you do that isn't good for you.

Most outbursts of destructive criticism is just their own issue and has nothing to do with you. So consider the subject, consider the source, see if anything is relevant on your end, and then move forward.

Imogene11
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Sep 04, 2016 9:19 pm

Re: Does anyone get depressed from disapproval? (social anxiety)

Postby Imogene11 » Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:47 pm

This may be a super late reply, but I know exactly how you feel. I have two older sisters whom have a different mother than I. My oldest sister has two children who she takes to her grandmothers house on her mothers side when she has work. Whenever she can't pick them up I will and that's not too often. One time that I went over there her grandmother had asked me when I started school, since I live at home and go to school in my city I'm not super excited about school. So I told her sometime at the end of August, and I don't know if it were the way I said it or if my whole family speaks of me as a failure, but her response was "Taylor, are you passionate about anything?". Her response hit me to the core, I felt absolutely devastated. I hate feeling like a failure to my family, I try my hardest to impress them but I always feel like my efforts go unnoticed. And what she said validated that my family talks poorly about me, because she wouldn't know really anything about me unless it were my sisters and their mother. I thought about her comment for the rest of the day. I went home and cried and felt helpless. Now I dread whenever my sister asks me can I pick up my niece and nephew because I know she looks at me as a failure.

Katjie
Posts: 32
Joined: Wed Nov 30, 2016 3:20 am

Re: Does anyone get depressed from disapproval? (social anxiety)

Postby Katjie » Wed Nov 30, 2016 8:36 am

I feel like a failure all the time....in my relationships, in my career and even in my hobbies...long story, but I have been emotionally abused my whole life because people get evil pleasure on pouncing on the already weak...even my boyfriends caracters change after a while because I am not like other lady like selfassured women.

Make no mistake, strangers adore me but if I invest in a kind of relationship then they sense something in me even if I hide my depression and are very friendly and tactfull and considered (because I am very afraid of conflict).

I have given up on myself and other people, because nothing that I have tried, even my antidepressants work.


Return to “Living with Depression and other Related Health Concerns”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 320 guests