Quite a mess

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Posts: 6
Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2016 7:03 pm

Quite a mess

Postby Cerioth » Wed Aug 10, 2016 10:40 pm

I'm 24-year-old male from Finland, suffer from Borderline personality disorder, general anxiety, depression and possibly avoidant personality disorder. I've had BPD showing up since I was a teen and before that I always felt like bit of an outcaster around other people. I havent been able to make friends in real life due to the fact I have different interests, different view of the world and I'm not the easiest personality you will meet.

In childhood I went through a lot of things - mainly my parents always being unhappy with me, nothing I did was ever good. I experienced physical and mental abuse to the point I started self-harming, and I did not feel safer in school where I got bullied by other kids for not having friends. This lead to many problems for me - more or less stupid acting and decisions, being fostered at the age of 18, psych ward stays and so on.

I currently have emergency meds for anxiety attacks but no regular medication, been through several different meds and med combinations, havent really found the one for me so far, and have tried some therapy. I live alone and have issues managing day to day life. I'm currently disabled.

I'm not sure what else to add here, that's all for now.

They always find you in the shadows
For my heart is a light house of burning flame
Straight into the heart, my love, straight into the heart

Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Mar 05, 2017 12:09 pm
Location: Hawaii

Re: Quite a mess

Postby TerriK » Sun Mar 05, 2017 1:23 pm

Life can certainly be overwhelming can't it? I am 59 and I've done some pretty stupid things since diagnosis of Bipolar Manic Disorder 1 at age 38. So you are NOT alone. I have a few good days among mostly days of nothingness. I have one friend where I live. She is 29 miles away with no car so we never see each other. I don't like being in groups and have to force myself to leave my house. It is a real pain in the backside some days. So don't feel alone. I'm pretty much feeling where you are!

Smile! It makes people wonder what you are up to!
Aloha. May "Grandfather" walk this journey beside you and help guide you through the clouds that appear before you. Your journey may pass through dark clouds and many storms. Do not despair. One day, the clouds will part and you will feel the suns warmth on your face. The grass will be a vivid green and will smell wonderful. You will smile! Your journey has been a challenge.... but was worth the walk. Go bravely my friend. May "Grandfather" and God walk with you.

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