Not the best of support

Depression/anxiety may have touched your family, your friends, yourself; what helps you to deal with it? Sharing is caring!

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Baird1920
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2019 3:11 am

Not the best of support

Postby Baird1920 » Fri Feb 22, 2019 3:23 am

Honestly, I am not the best support at all for my partner who has suffered with depression and anxiety for a long time.

I don't deal with situations very well, get wrapped up in the stress of holding it all together, get weighed down with the worry of one day our family lives could be turned upside down.

So much so that this attitude becomes more of an issue than the depression itself. Over time I have lost who I am and have never reached out to people for fear that it will male my partner worse as people may say the wrong thing and upset them.

I find it hard to express wants and desires and support to encourage to try and do things a little differently. My partner is obese and it is difficult to say something needs to be done now to stop overeating every night, but the fear of a reaction into deeper depression and further eating is a big worry.

They are currently receiving treatment with mental health workers so we are moving in the right direction.

I love them to pieces and I just need an outlay to where I can drop my thoughts and possibly get advice or support.

I know my attitude is wrong and I want to change it but first I need to express things and go from there.


Massive waffle I know but it's a good start.

DJStudios
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2019 3:01 am

Re: Not the best of support

Postby DJStudios » Sat Feb 23, 2019 3:32 am

Hi, I'm from DJStudios and I read your situation. Depression stems from a lot of things and in your partner's case it might have been from the current state of obesity that is present, there is no right pill nor certain medication that will make the depression he feels healed or just go away, but support for him is more of a place of security where in he can feel safe enough and loved enough to be able to aspire to get out of that physical and emotional state. It's okay for you both not to be okay of the situation, that's fine but the advantage is that you have someone as your support system and a place of intimacy, preventing or overlooking does not change the fact that your family lives are not changing because when you suppress it has this tendency to come back in a bigger state. And your fear does not make you a bad partner but rather someone who cares enough to be careful with her steps towards a sensitive topic. I suggest having a serious and intimate discussion over your situation with your partner and help him with a change of eating and stress lifestyle towards a good direction through just small steps like finding out the reason for over eating and then start the plan on how to slowly progress on having a healthy diet and being physically fit meaning eating adequate amount of food and just activities that help maintain the healthy living.

- Sincerely, DJStudios

Prycejosh1987
Posts: 424
Joined: Sun May 31, 2020 10:54 am
Location: Birmingham UK

Re: Not the best of support

Postby Prycejosh1987 » Thu Jun 04, 2020 5:02 am

Baird1920 wrote:Honestly, I am not the best support at all for my partner who has suffered with depression and anxiety for a long time.

I don't deal with situations very well, get wrapped up in the stress of holding it all together, get weighed down with the worry of one day our family lives could be turned upside down.

So much so that this attitude becomes more of an issue than the depression itself. Over time I have lost who I am and have never reached out to people for fear that it will male my partner worse as people may say the wrong thing and upset them.

I find it hard to express wants and desires and support to encourage to try and do things a little differently. My partner is obese and it is difficult to say something needs to be done now to stop overeating every night, but the fear of a reaction into deeper depression and further eating is a big worry.

They are currently receiving treatment with mental health workers so we are moving in the right direction.

I love them to pieces and I just need an outlay to where I can drop my thoughts and possibly get advice or support.

I know my attitude is wrong and I want to change it but first I need to express things and go from there.


Massive waffle I know but it's a good start.

You have mentioned the problem and the solution in the same message. Problem: Your not being supportive enough. Solution: express things and go from there. I think you should communicate with your partner, and give emotional support to him. You have to confront problems together and for each other. Good luck.


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