My name is Stephanie. I'm 34 years old, married, with two children that i love more than life. I have dealt with depression since I was a child. My father shot himself when I was 9. I tried to commit suicide when I was 12 and 15 by taking pills. My father committed suicide by shooting himself in the head when he was 38 years old. So, depression has always been in my life. My parents weren't good ones. They were alcoholics; they were days we had nothing to eat. I was molested by my uncle from about age 5 til 9. I finally told my parents what he did to me. They did nothing. At this point in my life, I have an amazing husband, good job, and good kids. But there is not a day that passes that I don't think about suicide. I'm seeking medical help and thought I'd try this support group. So, that's my sad and pathetic story.
I do maintain a job. I'm a computer programmer from Mississippi. I will not have my kids doing without like I did. The reason I sought help was that I cannot hurt my children so I still have some control. I'm hoping to get my prozac tomorrow and get back on track.
Introduction
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Introduction
Last edited by steph1975 on Tue May 05, 2009 10:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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thinking about suicide
i think about suicide and the devistation it would cause my family /i think about the depression laughing at me as i let out my dying breath /i think about the wispers in the street and shops /i think about what is there /it may be a worse place than we know now /so think hard/we are all listeners here and we care /so tell us/ share /and question us /reach out and we will catch your fall /you came to the right place /steph/welcome home ,,,,,,,,,,xn728
Steph,
I don't think anyone who read your story doesn't totally agree with you that your story is sad.
You are certainly not pathetic. A very strong woman, to have endured all that you have in your life. In no way pathetic.
It was many years ago that I tried to commit suicide. It was a very dark time in my life. After that many therapists tried to drum into my head, that children of parents that commit suicide, are many times more likely to attempt on their own lives.
That stopped me. I wish that you didn't have to go through that with your father. I wonder if that might play a part in your strong urges to end things for you.
I am sure that you will find support from this forum. There are many of us who have, and are the better for it.
Keep posting.
I don't think anyone who read your story doesn't totally agree with you that your story is sad.
You are certainly not pathetic. A very strong woman, to have endured all that you have in your life. In no way pathetic.
It was many years ago that I tried to commit suicide. It was a very dark time in my life. After that many therapists tried to drum into my head, that children of parents that commit suicide, are many times more likely to attempt on their own lives.
That stopped me. I wish that you didn't have to go through that with your father. I wonder if that might play a part in your strong urges to end things for you.
I am sure that you will find support from this forum. There are many of us who have, and are the better for it.
Keep posting.
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