Stayed in bed until almost 4pm today...
Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2018 1:33 am
Hello, I'm Suzy and I'm in my late twenties.
I got up and had breakfast around 10:30am but then went back to bed not long after and stayed there until almost 4pm today...I napped a bit but mostly read comics on my phone and cuddled with my dog. Today I was supposed to go to quilting group with my grandma and run some errands on my own after that but I didn't...again. Since I got up I've been wanting to just go lay back down but I haven't.
Last week I went into the doctor and explained a bit about what's going on and got a prescription for an emotional support animal for my dog. I was really hesitant but my husband encouraged me to go ahead and see about having her as my emotional support animal "just in case". I don't plan to be taking her anywhere with me that I wouldn't normally but that's a bit of my problem...I don't leave my house. Honestly if it weren't for my pets I probably wouldn't go outside much in general. I'm not working right now and honestly thinking about applying for jobs makes me very overwhelmed and results in days like today basically. I've been training her to be my service dog, not that I have a professional saying I need one...I still need to see one of those. So far she does pressure therapy, redirection when I start to stress/panic, and she can handle some serious cuddles, like today, just hours of me just curled up around her and she never pulls away. We're still working on a few things when we're in public since she can get a bit distracted with people wanting to pet her. I only take her to places that are dog friendly, usually just the local thrift store or home improvement store. I finally got out of bed today because my dog told me to when I realized how long I'd been in bed and started to stress so she did pressure therapy combined with nose nudging to motivate me, I'm so proud she's learned to do this independently already.
Hoarding, that's a big thing. I've gotten a lot better and I recognized it when I was still a teen and have slowly worked to let things go enough that I'm down to a more manageable amount of stuff. It's mainly specific collections of things, many different collections of things. I think most of my anxiety stuff can track back to realizing I was a hoarder and trying to get that under control or managed somehow. Now I mostly hoard digital creatures and items in online pet sims like FlightRising.com, I'm super into my dragons on there. There are a bunch of pet sim sites I rarely or don't really use anymore but I know my hoard of creatures/stuff isn't going anywhere so it's like I have a bunch of stashes tucked away.
I did finally start seeing a counselor but they were like 15 minute appointments once a month where she would ask how I've been, I admit I didn't do most of what she suggested and her just making other suggestions...so I guess I wasn't really being that helpful but I was all for sharing feelings and stuff. I still have the list of books she suggested and podcasts...I should probably look into those at some point.
I tend to talk a lot (I cut so much out of this post already) and overshare, my mom's like that too. My husband it baffled by it because I talk when nervous and all the while my mouth keeps talking while I'm just yelling at myself in my head to shut up already.
So yeah, there's A LOT about me. I decided I should find some place where I could talk to similar people, I have some friends who have anxiety and depression but I don't want to put that burden on our friendships. I figured in a place like this I'd find other people who are actually looking to help and share in that support with others.
I've never self-harmed or thought of it so I think because of that I tried to convince myself I don't really need help but I've realized that I really do need to get something figured out because I'm just hiding all the time.
I got up and had breakfast around 10:30am but then went back to bed not long after and stayed there until almost 4pm today...I napped a bit but mostly read comics on my phone and cuddled with my dog. Today I was supposed to go to quilting group with my grandma and run some errands on my own after that but I didn't...again. Since I got up I've been wanting to just go lay back down but I haven't.
Last week I went into the doctor and explained a bit about what's going on and got a prescription for an emotional support animal for my dog. I was really hesitant but my husband encouraged me to go ahead and see about having her as my emotional support animal "just in case". I don't plan to be taking her anywhere with me that I wouldn't normally but that's a bit of my problem...I don't leave my house. Honestly if it weren't for my pets I probably wouldn't go outside much in general. I'm not working right now and honestly thinking about applying for jobs makes me very overwhelmed and results in days like today basically. I've been training her to be my service dog, not that I have a professional saying I need one...I still need to see one of those. So far she does pressure therapy, redirection when I start to stress/panic, and she can handle some serious cuddles, like today, just hours of me just curled up around her and she never pulls away. We're still working on a few things when we're in public since she can get a bit distracted with people wanting to pet her. I only take her to places that are dog friendly, usually just the local thrift store or home improvement store. I finally got out of bed today because my dog told me to when I realized how long I'd been in bed and started to stress so she did pressure therapy combined with nose nudging to motivate me, I'm so proud she's learned to do this independently already.
Hoarding, that's a big thing. I've gotten a lot better and I recognized it when I was still a teen and have slowly worked to let things go enough that I'm down to a more manageable amount of stuff. It's mainly specific collections of things, many different collections of things. I think most of my anxiety stuff can track back to realizing I was a hoarder and trying to get that under control or managed somehow. Now I mostly hoard digital creatures and items in online pet sims like FlightRising.com, I'm super into my dragons on there. There are a bunch of pet sim sites I rarely or don't really use anymore but I know my hoard of creatures/stuff isn't going anywhere so it's like I have a bunch of stashes tucked away.
I did finally start seeing a counselor but they were like 15 minute appointments once a month where she would ask how I've been, I admit I didn't do most of what she suggested and her just making other suggestions...so I guess I wasn't really being that helpful but I was all for sharing feelings and stuff. I still have the list of books she suggested and podcasts...I should probably look into those at some point.
I tend to talk a lot (I cut so much out of this post already) and overshare, my mom's like that too. My husband it baffled by it because I talk when nervous and all the while my mouth keeps talking while I'm just yelling at myself in my head to shut up already.
So yeah, there's A LOT about me. I decided I should find some place where I could talk to similar people, I have some friends who have anxiety and depression but I don't want to put that burden on our friendships. I figured in a place like this I'd find other people who are actually looking to help and share in that support with others.
I've never self-harmed or thought of it so I think because of that I tried to convince myself I don't really need help but I've realized that I really do need to get something figured out because I'm just hiding all the time.