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I'm new here ! :)

Posted: Wed May 16, 2018 7:42 am
by Yume
Hello everyone !

I'm 22 years old from France,
I'm suffering from depression and eating disorders. Mostly because of the weird education my parents gave me and the bad relationship I have with them.
I'm working as an accountant (started 2 years ago), not a dream job but I'm glad I'm not unemployed.
Overall I'm fine as I'm starting to get used to my troubles and I see doctors and a therapist.
But having a community where I could feel comfortable misses me somehow. Not that I'm especially a loner, but I don't feel on the same wave lenght with many many people. I should try to improve my social skills IRL but right now I just want to have nice chats online.
Among my hobbies : writing letters, gardening, reading (when I'm able to focus on it), playing video games, walking in the nature.

I'm looking forward to meet you all!

Have a good day!

Re: I'm new here ! :)

Posted: Thu May 17, 2018 11:45 am
by Peacebwu2017
Welcome! I can relate to having anxiety, depression, seasons of life not really being bad just not the dream, rough relationships with extended family and going through times I feel pretty lonely in the "friend" area. I can also appreciate the hobbies as we share common ground there too. I love to grow an organic vegetable and fruit garden, explore nature, listen to birds and watch their anxious little movements as they find what they need, I love studying and reading good books. I guess you could say I'm a forever student. I also like creating in the kitchen. I specialize in working with alternative foods and making them palatable to typical Americans.

I hope for you to find beauty in your every day! Sometimes the simple pleasures of life are our greatest gifts. I get into times I think I'm confused on what happy looks like and don't know how to obtain it...then, for example, out of no where I tell the family to pull over at a track without telling them what came across my mind. I instruct them to quickly get out of the car and get to the track. One kid is thrilled with anticipation and excitement while the other is hanging on edge and hates the unknown surprises. The anticipation builds as we hurry to the track. Family starts to bring to my attention they don't have running shoes, aches or whatever is flooding their curious minds. I tell them to line up and we're racing around the track 1 time. (Back story- I haven't been able to run in 7 years with Fibromyalgia among other auto-immune type things) I'm determined, as I say a quick prayer asking for strength to follow though and join the family, to ride this adventure. We take off. It's a bit of chaos as some choose to cut across the football field and I'm a very slow, possibly hobble, jog. I'm gasping for air and my throat feels dry. But, the air is crisp, the sun is setting in brilliant vibrant colors right at the track horizon, the dark is starting to come in gently. It's beautiful. The family no matter how many complaints this isn't the right thing because of whatever excuse or how hard....everyone is having fun. We reach the end one by one and I celebrate in front of strangers my kids beat mom and dad. Then, I decided competition isn't the name of the game so we celebrate the fun together as a family. I remember thinking to myself "huh, this is fun? so simple! Why is this fun? It was physically torturous to some degree. No planning. Didn't take but a few minutes. Couple of us felt really nauseous afterwards. So why was this fun for us all?" For those that enjoy the thrill and excitement of unknowns it built a couple minutes of anticipation. We got our bodies moving. It was unexpected and very different than the typical mom. It was beautiful. And, we did it together. We individually pushed ourselves to reach a simple goal. There wasn't pressure of time, how we got there, no condemnation and it didn't matter if we ran fast, jogged, hobbled, or walked in part...we did it!

May this story encourage you today to find a simple joy and fun. Do something crazy, spontaneous, without thought of all the obstacles. Build a new hobby, create or build an already interest into a more skillful art. Set a goal that's small and obtainable. Enjoy life in a simple way for a moment like a child so free. Big hugs! You're not alone!

Re: I'm new here ! :)

Posted: Mon May 21, 2018 4:53 am
by nightingale77
Hi Yume, welcome to the forum! Thank you for sharing your life. It gives me some comfort to know that though you are going through a difficult season in your life, you choose to response positively by seeking help for your depression and therapist. Not only that, you actively seek out for a community with like minded people so that we can all journey together. Thank you. You are such an inspiration. I’m 41 this year. I love to read too, though like you, sometimes I find it very hard to focus when I try to read. Otherwise, I enjoy a good book, a cup of tea or coffee and just curl up on my lazy chair and just stare into space far away. I exercise every day too. It helps me to cope with my depression better. It’s one the the best anti-depressants! Glad to be connected with you in this forum! Praying for you. God bless!