It's true, unbelievable but true.

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Depressed_Pastor
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Apr 27, 2017 3:27 am

It's true, unbelievable but true.

Postby Depressed_Pastor » Thu Apr 27, 2017 5:42 am

My story reads like a soap opera. But I affirm it is true...
It begins with a visit from my mom and dad just a few days before their 52nd wedding anniversary. Interestingly enough their anniversary fell on the day that Hurricane Katrina hit. My wife and I were living and pastoring in south Mississippi. Due to my parents health they had to be immediately evacuated back to the state they lived as they were both in since they both used electrical durable medical devices. Their evacuation opened the door to my wife and I heading up a very effective relief operation for the people of Pearlington, Mississippi. We worked daily with the people face to face and I don't regret a moment of the most gut wrenching pastoral counseling I've ever been privileged to be a part of. Our relief efforts however came to an abrupt end due to my wife being bitten by a brown-recluse spider and the big it self becoming infected. The bite was lanced by Emergency Room Physician to debrid the infected tissue. The incision became grossly infected and she ended up with sepsis and being hospitalized for 14 days and two surgeries to take care of the situation. We arrived home from her hospital stay on April the 4 of 2006 and literally within minutes of entering the house I received a phone call from my sister informing me that my only biological nephew, a boy I helped to raise and was more like a son than a nephew had been involved in a boating accident in Moline, Illinois. His boat had capsized; he and another young man's body were lost and search and rescue efforts had begun. * We packed and left south Mississippi for Moline. My sister and I didn't have the best of relationships at the time, in fact things were bad enough that even though we had traveled that far and would have to stay an unspecified amount of time we were not welcome to stay in her home so we would have to stay in a motel.* I going to leave out a lot of personal details that lead to a lot of emotional distress. Hopefully you can imagine with the not knowing of my nephew's condition and the bitter family relationship with my sister the emotional state it put me in is indescribable. * On April the 6th I felt the situation was grave enough that my parents should make the trip to be involved since they had still not recovered my nephew. At this point it was pretty certain he had not survived the accident. My parents were visiting my aunt (my dad's sister) in Kentucky at the time. By the way, my parents home was in North Carolina. As they were preparing to make the trip to Illinois my mom fell and broke her right hip requiring emergency surgery. Following mom's surgery my dad went back to my cousin's house where they were staying while visiting my aunt. He had wanted to visit with her because she was in stage 4 of lung cancer and had already been placed on hospice. He had gone back to the house to get my mom's personal items. After getting to the house and visiting with my cousin for a short time dad said he was really tired and needed to lay down for a little while. Later that day when my cousin got off work on her first job she noticed my dad's car was still there so she though she would check on him since he was supposed to have gone back to the hospital right after she left for work that morning. * When she got home she found my dad had lain down across the bed and died. This was on April the 8th. After she notified me by phone she informed me that my mom did not know and she felt it would be best if the news of his death came from me. Although I am in Illinois dealing with my nephew's fate, I now had the responsibility of calling my mom who had just hours ago came out of hip replacement surgery that her husband of 52 years was dead. Her grandson was still technically listed as missing and the efforts of searching for him was being suspended due to the lack of any positive findings. * My sister, who wouldn't let me stay at her house and her son was missing and now being told her dad was dead informed me the only way her and her husband could go to Kentucky where we would hold my dad's funeral is if my wife and I took them. Little did I know that what she meant was that not only would we have to let them ride with us, but we would have to pay their expenses along the way as well. What she didn't know is everything my wife and I were living on was borrowed money ourselves. We made the trip to Kentucky. * Mom informed me they had no life insurance. They were both on social security disability and had no way of paying for my dad's funeral. I had to borrow more money to pay for dad's funeral. I was also informed that the only way there would be a funeral is if I preached my dad's funeral. I had to make arrangements with the local ambulance service for them to transport my mom to the funeral and back to the nursing home where she would have to be in rehab for the next 28 days. * I preached my dad's funeral and then returned to Illinois with my sister and her husband to find that my nephew was still missing. * At this point due to the fact I had to get ready for my mom to come and live with my wife and I once her rehab was over and I really had to get back to work as well. We begin our trip home only to be called by the Illinois State Police when were 2 hours away to be told that a body had been found and they had reason to believe it was nephew but they needed someone to positively identify the body. My sister and her husband told them they were to emotional unstable to do so and they needed to call me to make the identification. I retuned to Moline and it was indeed my nephew. I had to make the identification of my nephew's body after being in the river for 18 days. * I was also asked by my sister and her x-husband to preach my nephew's funeral. * Back to the money situation, my sister informed me she didn't have the money to pay her half of my nephew's funeral. Once again I had to borrow more money. * Finally I make the trip home to get my house ready for my mom to move in. After getting the house ready I went back to Kentucky to get my mom from the nursing home and took her back to North Carolina to get her things from mom and dad's apartment. She couldn't stand to go in the house so it was left to my wife and I to load everything she owned on a trailer and move it back to Mississippi. This all takes place from April 4th to May the 2nd of 2006.

This is just the first part of the tragic story that had landed me into a horrible depression. Folks, I am at the end of my rope. I feel like my whole life is just a wreck. I won't tell the whole rest of the story here but where I am now is I've lost my job pastoring and have been out of work since September of last year. I've been denied any financial assistance from the government and we are essentially homeless. We are living in our camper in my wife's sister's back yard. I feel like a first class failure at everything in life. For the first time in my life I am wondering if life is worth trying to live anymore. Please someone talk to me. Is there any hope left in life. I know this dates back to 2006 but I held it all in and everything just kept piling up until last September. I just can't take any more!

live2ndin
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2017 9:19 am

Re: It's true, unbelievable but true.

Postby live2ndin » Mon May 01, 2017 7:43 pm

Friend, it sounds like you have been the rock and support system for your family for a long time and I admire you for being so strong. For men like us, I often find it hard to allow myself to be weak and try to lean on others for support. Reading your story I couldn't help but be reminded of Job, and as you know, even at his worst point, God hadn't forgotten Job and had complete control of the entire situation. It will get better. Please, if you don't mind I'd like to put you in my prayers.

Helloraspberries1
Posts: 260
Joined: Wed May 25, 2016 2:11 pm

Re: It's true, unbelievable but true.

Postby Helloraspberries1 » Tue May 02, 2017 11:38 am

I'm sorry to hear that. How are things now? Hope your ok.


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