(Im new)i need someone to talk too=(

[bigbuck]

well for the most i've always had my head up high. but lately that has changed and now i feel lower than anyones ever been.i've been with a girl for about 1yr 1/2 now. n i've always had problems but not like i do now though...i feel like crying all the time. shes very opened minded and i've never had a problem with that until now. i have so much on my mind i've tried suicide several times but havent been successful. i have a hard time sleeping i can go for about 48 hrs n not be able to sleep. my main problem is i guess i got use to her being there supporting me. i would do the same for her but i guess she's tired of it...she can say the most horrible things to me, but dont realize it, and when she does its too late... i cant get or keep a job cuz this is just too much for me i dont think i am able to handle more of this. i love her with all my heart and i know she does too. theres just something between us and i hate it cuz i want some1 to cheer me up i need some1 to cheer me up, some1 that can make me feel wanted, loved. i have my family, but to them i've never had a problem or anything to worry about and its hard to talk to them i dont need medication and knowing them thats the first thing they want me on well anyways. i want to keep her happy as she use to keep me. if i leave her n let go i know i things for me will get worse. its happened before. i've made bad decisions with her that has made her feel horrible but i've done everything i can to make it up to her. n now its like i have to go to hell n back for her to be satisfied. i've just graduated, and started college, i got my first job n wasnt able to keep it. i get major migrains or headaches..... n me n her are always argueing. im 19 and im in debt already. i just wish i could tell her everything im telling you guys. but im afraid she doesnt want to here it. i cant let go. i want to just quit on everything i cant think i cant sleep i lost my appitite. im always at home, im losing hope on myself. i have friends but i've always been the person that never shows he has a problem or worries. so i cant talk to them. i need some1 to understand me. i hate this really. i wish i could sleep. i wish i could smile. i hate crying. and lately its all i've been doing!!!!What kills me is me thinking she doesnt care anymore, and that i cant run to anyone n just let it out to some one. i feel trapped!!i want to let it out so bad i need some1 to talk to....

[Emotional_77]

Hi bigbuck you have come to the right place here. This place is very supportive and we are here to always listen to you. If you ever need someone like you said just PM me hun.. I am 20, female and recently got out of a two year relationship and my depression was a part of it. I would love to hear from you. Anyway welcome to the site

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

Welcome (((((((((((( bigbuck )))))))))))))) <--- a gentle welcoming hug for you.

This is a wonderful place, and so hoping you continuet to post. There is a chat room as well, with loving, understanding and supportive chatters there. Maybe come visit, test the waters so to speak.

Again, welcome!!

Warmie/Jeanie13

[Fupduck]

Hi Bigbuck, we haven't met yet, but I am looking forward to doing just that. I can relate to your story so well. I have a wife who doesn't understand after 28 years, so I know that hurt. And I too am disabled, so I understand you again. I really hope we can chat! I think it would help us both, as I have no one who understands either. I am so glad you are here, we all are! Your Friend, fupduck

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

Hello again bigbuck, just checking in on you to see how things are going. Hope you post again, stay in touch.

Warmie