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akahachi
Posts: 7
Joined: Sun May 26, 2013 10:08 pm

Hello

Postby akahachi » Sun May 26, 2013 10:23 pm

Hey, nice to meet you.

As is the way with depression and anxiety, I have always had it but the symptoms only became visible when, you guessed it, I was a teenager. However, it is only recently that I have started to seek help as the symptoms are now more extreme since moving out of my comfort zone.

I speak with a psychiatrist twice a month and take anti-depressants, an anti-anxiety drug twice a day and sleeping pills. Haha, I'm a bit of a mess.

What I was hoping for when I decided to register on this forum was maybe to get some advise on how to handle the low points and some mental exercises to hopefully change my negative thought processes.

I really hope you guys can help me out and I hope that once I'm back on track that I can return the favour. I quite earnestly want to help others in any way I can but lately I just don't have the willpower to even take care of myself properly let alone others.

So yeah. A lot to ask and I know I'm not the only one in this big old lonely hole. But thank you in advance for your understanding.
xx

jj
Posts: 411
Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2011 8:24 am
Location: UK
Contact:

Postby jj » Thu Jun 20, 2013 11:53 am

Hi akahachi, welcome.

During the low points what helps me is talking to people and their support and affection. Also meditation helps me to relax my mind but usually im unmotivated to help myself in that way. I would strongly recommend looking into it though. When i do do it it helps me let go of all the hard thoughts and feelings im having so much, leaves me feeling very calm and peaceful. Hope this helps

See you around

Jj

Frame
Moderator
Posts: 1081
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:25 am
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby Frame » Thu Jun 20, 2013 12:05 pm

I'm with JJ on both points. It might seem contradictory that through all the confusion and swarming thoughts you should pay more attention, but both his suggestions, writing here and meditation, allow me to look at whats going on in my head in a less-judgmental less-reactive environment.

They can bring feelings of clarity and a sense that they might be manageble, often a good place to start.

The one point I would make, in all I've learned about meditation; it requires a discipline. It works, it works, it works; but it's when you don't think it's working that it's working. It's like those damn meds. They take months to be effective. But unlike meds., Yes you do have to sit there for the full half hour (or what ever.)

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Ghost
Posts: 30
Joined: Mon Jun 10, 2013 8:45 am

Postby Ghost » Thu Jun 20, 2013 12:07 pm

akahachi, when I went to college, study made me feel better. I also play chess, play videogames, other board games, listen to music and read a lot.

An important thing to keep in mind when doing these things: don't do it as an escape valve! You'll feel terrible later if you find out you're only running from yourself. Avoid music and literature that promises to make you feel better.

It is important to be in good terms with yourself, so take care of your body and exercise your mind. Even if you feel you don't like anything, try doing something different each time.

Hope this was useful!

jj
Posts: 411
Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2011 8:24 am
Location: UK
Contact:

Postby jj » Thu Jun 20, 2013 12:11 pm

Yeah the effects of meditation are like a snowball effect, its not really about sitting once for a long while, but doing it regularly to really get the benefits of it. I go up and down in my discipline with it though.

Frame im a gal by the way not a dude hehe :)

akahachi
Posts: 7
Joined: Sun May 26, 2013 10:08 pm

Postby akahachi » Tue Sep 03, 2013 9:18 pm

Hey guys! Sorry I've been away from the forum for a while. I actually went back to the UK for a long trip home and that has really helped- I don't really know if it counts as meditation but I have a lot of places there where I can relax and feel at ease.
I guess the trouble is here, people don't really know how to deal with me when I get like that... Would you guys have any tips of how to reach people and get them to see what you need? I've tried saying I need loads of hugs and reassurance and cups of tea but it doesn't seem to have made a difference. Makes me feel kinda guilty and ashamed afterwards, you know?
But seriously, thank you so much for all your advise and encouragement!!
Akahachi x

Frame
Moderator
Posts: 1081
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:25 am
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby Frame » Wed Sep 04, 2013 7:33 am

As I look back at my life, I get the sense of a world moving way to fast. There are books or scientific studies that can support this finding, but for the most part I'm surrounded by people who are comfortable spinning out their lives at this pace. It's a rare thing for someone like me to find the right space to thrive. People are irritated by...Oh...I still don't know what. I just don't fit.

I was listening to "Fresh Air with Terry Gross" yesterday (best talk show host ever) and she was interviewing a modern orchestral composer, John Zorn. At on point he mentioned that he still lives out of card board boxes in his apartment. The interview was in honor of his sixtieth birthday. He works at the child's desk (Gustov Stickley no less) he grew up with. His point was that he has chosen to simplify is life; his habits, his home, his friends,... all in the service of is passion for creation of music.

He is obviously (if you listen to the interview) an irritating and irritable person. And not everyone has the privilege of setting up their phyiscal life the way they want. But I find wisdom in his approach of simplifying his life. I find I let too much of the world in. I generally feel forced to do this in the service of survival; however most of our actions are driven by our expectations. No matter how much I loose (and I have lost much, have much more to loose) I always feel more focused and at peace when I reject the world for the sake of my art. So I share something with John Zorn (even if not his achievement or privilege).

So this may not seem like advice your looking for but something I've noticed: I get more hugs and cups of tea from the people that really matter when I can muster the strength to reject the parts of the world that don't matter. When people can see my passion with clarity (when I can see my passion with clarity) I tend to find more of what I need. Oh, and meditation is an essential tool no matter what people think. I have an artist friend who counts the time he is fully engrossed in his work, as meditation. And I agree.


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