Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2005 9:17 pm
1. COACH: What would you say to a glass of beer, Norm?
NORM : Going Down?
2. COACH: What would you say to a glass of beer, Norm?
NORM : Daddy wuvs you.
3. COACH: What's shaking, Norm?
NORM : All 4 cheeks and a couple of chins.
4. COACH: What'll it be, Normie?
NORM : Just the usual Coach. I'll have a froath of beer and a snorkel.
5. SAM : What'll you have, Norm?
NORM : Well I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll have a glass of whatever comes of whatever comes out of that tap.
SAM : Oh, Looks like beer, Norm.
NORM : Call me Mister Lucky.
6. WOODY: Hey Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you.
NORM : I know, and if she calls, I'm not here.
7. WOODY: Hey Mr. Peterson, Jack Frost been nipping at your nose?
NORM : Yep. Now let's get Joe Beer nipping at my liver, huh?
8. COACH: Can I draw you a beer, Norm?
NORM : No, I know what one looks like. Just pour me one.
9. COACH: How about a beer, Norm?
NORM : Hey I'm high on life, Cooach....Of course, beer is my life.
10. COACH: How's a beer sound, Norm?
NORM : I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in.
11. COACH: What's going down, Normie?
NORM : My butt cheeks on that bar stool.
12. COACH: What's up, Norm?
NORM : Corners of my mouth, Coach.
13. COACH: Beer, Normie?
NORM : Uh, Coach, I dunno, I had one this week. Eh, why not, I'm still young.
14. COACH: Normie, Normie, could this be Vera?
NORM : With a lot of expensive surgery, maybe.
15. COACH: What's up, Normie?
NORM : The tempurature under my collar, Coach.
16. COACH: What's up, Norm?
NORM : Everything that's supposed to be.
17. COACH: What's up, Normie?
NORM : My nipples, it's freezing out there.
18. SAM : What's new, Norm?
NORM : Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer.
19. SAM : What'd you like, Norm?
NORM : A reason to live. Gimme another beer.
20. SAM : What do you say, Norm?
NORM : Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer.
21. SAM : What do you say to a beer, Norm?
NORM : Hiya sailor. New in town?
22. SAM : What's the good word, Norm?
NORM : Plop, plop, fizz,fizz.
23. SAM : Oh no, not the Hungry Heifer...
NORM : Yeah, yeah, yeah....
SAM : One heartburn cocktail coming up.
24. SAM : How's life in the fast lane?
NORM : Dunno, I can't get on the on-ramp.
25. SAM : What's the story, Norm?
NORM : Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer.
26. SAM : How about a beer, Norm?
NORM : That's that amber sudsy stuff, right? I've heard great things about it.
27. SAM : How's life treating you, Norm?
NORM : It's not, Sammy, but you can.
28. SAM : Beer, Norm?
NORM : Have I gotten that predictable? Good.
29. SAM : Whatcha up to, Norm?
NORM : My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall.
30. SAM : How's life treating you, Norm?
NORM : Like it caught me sleeping with his wife.
31. NORM : Afternoon everybody.
ALL : Norm!
CLIFF: Afternoon everybody.
ALL : [silence]
32. NORM : [come in from the rain] Evening everbody.
ALL : Norm!
SAM : Still pouring, Norm?
NORM : That's funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.
33. WOODY: Can I pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : A little early isn't it?
WOODY: For a beer?
NORM : No, for a stupid question.
34. WOODY: What's the story, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to happy ending.
35. WOODY: How's it going, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : Poor.
WOODY: I'm sorry to hear that.
NORM : No, I mean pour.
36. WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : A sign flashing in my gut that says, "Insert beer here."
37. WOODY: What's your pleasure, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : Boxer shorts and loose shoes. But I'll settle for a beer.
38. WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : Another layer for winter, Wood.
39. WOODY: Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : Alright, but stop me at one.....make it one-thirty.
40. WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
NORM : The question is what's going in, Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody.
41. WOODY: How's it going Mr. Peterson?
NORM : It's a dog eat dog world out there, Woody, and I'm wearing milkbone underwear.
42. PAUL : Hey Norm, how's the world treating you?
NORM : Like a baby treats a diaper.
43. "Women. Can't live with 'em, pass the beer nuts."
Norm Peterson
Normisms -- funny lines from Norm on Cheers
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