Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2018 5:27 am


Postby tolen » Sun Oct 14, 2018 5:44 am

Hey so I'm Alex.
So I'm here to just vent out what I feel most of the time.
Everyday I go to school, go home, study, sleep then repeat.
I mean yeah, that's the normal thing kids at high school should be doing.

Though I don't understand.
Why I have to feel empty most of the time.
I study at a science High School and I can keep up my grades and avoid failing but there's this tightening in my chest that's suffocating.
The amount of work's probably stressing me out, I can usually control myself and avoid breaking down but these days,
I feel like I'm insignificant. I go home, then cry.
I know I should talk to my family about this but.
I can't just tell them, man. They're busy all the time, I don't want to be a nuisance.
Hell, I don't even talk to them that much.

A friend that's very close to me just cut himself.
Why? It was because of me.
He keeps denying that it's not me.
No, it's all me, i know and I don't want to deny it.
I don't understand why the world's so harsh to me. Why do I always have to be sad. Is it wrong for me to be contented? Did I do something bad? Why me? People say I have everything but why am I sad?

Sometimes. I just want to kill myself. I'm a pest. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm sinking into this deep well that I'll never get out of. I ask for help to countless people, they tell me to not kill myself and it's not my fault but why can't I forgive myself.

Someone please talk to me.

Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2018 5:27 am

Re: Hello

Postby tolen » Sun Oct 14, 2018 5:48 am

I'm sorry, I probably come off as another "edgy" teen.

Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:05 am

Re: Hello

Postby Martha07libran » Sun Oct 14, 2018 6:53 am

Hello alex
School is hard.I can identify you on this.And this whole academic pressure to perform.These duties and responsibilities do burden us. You might be lacking someone genuine someone to talk to.And I know that parents being busy and not understanding is very hard and harsh.Alex I don't know how you feel about being associated with a higher power or god means to you.But I feel it helps in great bounds.You should pray or write your difficulties to god.It would really strengthen you.If you feel this void and unexplainable loneliness.iIt might be your soul is hungry for its food which is god.Further too much thinking and stress also adds to physical stress which might lead to deficiencies in body.like vitamin b12,Vitamin D3etc. Stress leads to imbalance in brain chemicals that involve happy hormones.i really want to help you in whichever way possible.And not add to further miseries.Ifwhat I wrote is not what you like I apologise to you.Please don't feel bad.I would also like to suggest you something only I you like this.Spend time in Nature.It heals you.sunlight,grass,birds etc.

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Joined: Thu Aug 16, 2018 7:30 pm

Re: Hello

Postby sananTonyO » Wed Oct 17, 2018 8:11 pm

Hi there Alex,
I was already an adult when I felt like you did. I was actually doing well and had almost no problem but I felt empty, like what I am doing was useless, in and out, same thing everyday. Then just like Martha07libran suggested I discovered through a small group that there really is a God who created us. Some forums do not like this and I hope the moderators do not edit this message out because if it helped me it could help you. People today have been swayed by media, Hollywood and popular culture that there is no God but just invented by men’s imagination. Well, there are tons of books today that clarify that and every time they unearth some artifacts, it supports the Bible instead of discrediting it. If you want to know for sure, try getting this book called “I Do Not Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist,” by Frank Turek. It shows without using the Bible how to know that there really is a God. You might like to read it as well, Martha07libran. You will never look at the Bible in the same way after reading this book. Keep posted and PM me if you want.

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Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2018 8:24 pm

Re: Hello

Postby BenV » Thu Oct 18, 2018 10:40 pm

You don't come off as an edgy teen. You come off as someone that is searching, looking to understand.
I opinion is that as man has increased its knowledge and increased technological might that it is becoming more difficult to find contentment and purpose.
Our minds, occupied with ever greater demands for our time, 24/7 connectivity, social media, more and more choices that we suffer sensory overload. We become convinced we must compete at such a pace that we never really permit our being to relax and recharge. We do everything in such a hurry. Fast food, no time to cook. Microwave. No time for a letter or even an email, just a text or 140 character smash and dash of communication. We not only live in a hurry we even sleep in a hurry. Keep the brain running until we hit the pillow and kcik it back into gear as soon as we wake up. Gotta get that last scratch of info from all our friends as the lights go out and have to catch up on what we missed while sleeping.
Having friendships is now a competition.

I don't know how the youth today do it. I went through school before the internet, before cell phones.

Don't lose yourself. Make time for yourself. Find something your really enjoy, something not career or study related. Something that offers time only for you. You need to be able to breathe.

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Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:37 am

Re: Hello

Postby j2415 » Mon Oct 22, 2018 1:04 pm

Hi- No matter how busy your parents are, I hope you can talk to them. Please try to tell them about how you feel. I hope you can get the support and care you need from them.

My son is in senior high and he is also trying his best to keep up his grades, because of this, he is not having enough sleep and makes him cranky sometimes. Aside from academics he has extra curricular activities that make his schedule too tight. On weekends, he tried to have extra sleep and have some time to relax. I hope you also can find time to relax. Do some things that you will enjoy.

Please don’t think of killing yourself. You are not alone, we are here for you and willing to listen. I pray that you will overcome this sadness and things will get better for you. Please keep us posted.

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