I am a disgrace to everyone
Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 5:34 am
Hey guys,
I appreciate whoever takes the time to read this and appreciate any feedback as I need help.
I’m a 24 year old female and I don’t know what is wrong with me. I’m really starting to hate myself as I have made so many mistakes in my life. A few years ago I was addicted to marijuana, I’ve been clean almost a year now. I’ve also expiremented with the drug ice a number of times. Have not touched it in months only did it a number of times socially. I have basically betrayed most of my friends. I’ve slept with three of my friends boyfriends, one of my friends was even pregnant at the time! it’s like I didn’t think about the consequences or the persons involved. I’ve cheated in every relationship I’ve had. I’ve also taken out a $5,000 loan not for me but for a guy that I was seeing to help him out. He hasn’t paid me back and we are no longer seeing each other as he used me. I can’t save money and I’m in debt even though I live at home with Mum and dad.
I do things rationally. Every day when I wake up it’s a struggle. Nothing excites me.
I used to love drawing, go out and exercise but nothing excites me anymore. I look at myself in the mirror and just cry as I hate the person I have become. I’ve hurt so many people and torn apart relationships, it’s shameful because word gets around about me and I’m left with nobody but myself. I’m sitting here even feeling nauseous and shakes typing this. I don’t know what to do anymore.
I appreciate whoever takes the time to read this and appreciate any feedback as I need help.
I’m a 24 year old female and I don’t know what is wrong with me. I’m really starting to hate myself as I have made so many mistakes in my life. A few years ago I was addicted to marijuana, I’ve been clean almost a year now. I’ve also expiremented with the drug ice a number of times. Have not touched it in months only did it a number of times socially. I have basically betrayed most of my friends. I’ve slept with three of my friends boyfriends, one of my friends was even pregnant at the time! it’s like I didn’t think about the consequences or the persons involved. I’ve cheated in every relationship I’ve had. I’ve also taken out a $5,000 loan not for me but for a guy that I was seeing to help him out. He hasn’t paid me back and we are no longer seeing each other as he used me. I can’t save money and I’m in debt even though I live at home with Mum and dad.
I do things rationally. Every day when I wake up it’s a struggle. Nothing excites me.
I used to love drawing, go out and exercise but nothing excites me anymore. I look at myself in the mirror and just cry as I hate the person I have become. I’ve hurt so many people and torn apart relationships, it’s shameful because word gets around about me and I’m left with nobody but myself. I’m sitting here even feeling nauseous and shakes typing this. I don’t know what to do anymore.