Am I depressed?? Advice??

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born_confused
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2017 9:54 pm

Am I depressed?? Advice??

Postby born_confused » Tue Nov 07, 2017 10:10 pm

Hi (first time sorry if its bad)

I am in high school. My parents are divorced and I have a wonderful step mom. But, my real mom is another story. She fights with us all the time and is always yelling at me for no reason. I will lay in bed reading quotes and just cry. I have extremely bad social anxiety. I always feel like people are talking about me, but then at the same time I feel like i'm not important enough to be talked about. I feel fat, ugly, like a freak, I can't look in the mirror and like what I see cause who likes a freak. I've never had real friends and I have moved around a lot my whole life. I've thought about doing bad things and i can't do them because I am afraid someone will find out. I don't know if i depressed or anything because I don't want to be called attention seeking or something like that, but I also feel like I need some help. I can be out hanging out with friends and then I will just start like shutting down to where I don't want to talk to them and I just want to go home. I'm scarred to get close to anyone and I have built up my walls so high I even have trouble figuring myself out. I used to be happy and do whatever and just be happy. But, that isn't me anymore and I don't know what to do. I feel depressed and I know I have social anxiety, but I don't want to tell people cause I know other people have it worse and I shouldn't be complaining or whatever and be "attention seeking." I can be sitting in class and just shut down and feel sad and want to cry and when people ask whats wrong I don't know what to say because nothing is wrong, but at the same time everything is wrong. Can someone tell me whats wrong or something cause i'm extremely lost.

I've never had a real boyfriend or had someone that cares about me. Even i was able to find someone that cared enough my problems would scare them away. I want someone to understand. Someone that can relate to me and care. Someone that isn't so self centered that they can tell when i'm upset. I just need someone to care enough to help me figure myself out. Or better yet care enough to actually reply to this. I'm not looking for a permanent friend just some help please.

Suzi
Posts: 26
Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 9:33 am

Re: Am I depressed?? Advice??

Postby Suzi » Wed Nov 08, 2017 11:17 am

born_confused, so sorry you are having such a hard time. Is there a counselor at your school you could talk to? If you would rather be anonymous, or if you prefer texting, text 741741. You can get help and advice through texting.

Have you had a physical recently? If not, maybe you should see your family doctor, so he/she can rule out other issues, such as low thyroid.

You asked, "Am I depressed?" Maybe you are but you don't have to use that label on yourself. We all go through episodes in our lives when we feel lower or less happy than at other times. The good news is that our body and thinking will respond to course corrections. Like exercise and eating right and filling our minds with the truth. Unfortunately, the more we think about being depressed and tell ourselves we're depressed, the more depressed we become. Instead of thinking about that, think about who you want to be in 2 years or 5 or 10 years. Are you interested in something that you could study in college or technical school? If so, are there steps you can take today to help you achieve your goal? Do you see what I mean? We will become what we do. Our life will be the result of the choices and habits we make today. I believe that you are a valuable human being and that God has given you many gifts and abilities. Focus on finding out what they are and cultivating them.

rachelangelo
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:11 am

Re: Am I depressed?? Advice??

Postby rachelangelo » Fri Nov 10, 2017 9:33 am

Thanks for being so open and honest. Being teenager is a difficult time. You're trying to figure out the world on top of changing and growing. I can relate to how you feel. Although I'm no longer a teenager, I was one--so I know how you feel. Have you considered seeing a counselor at school about your anxiety and depression? Talking to someone really helps. I dealt with self-worth issues for years. One day, I decided that I was going to start saying kind things about myself. For years, I had beat myself up with negative words. I was my own worst enemy. But, when I started speaking kind words (out loud) about myself everyday, I started feeling different. It may sound weird, but try looking at yourself in the mirror everyday and saying, "I am valuable. I am wanted. I am loved. I am beautiful. I am worth fighting for. Anxiety, you have no control over me. Depression, I refuse to give into your lies. I am successful. I am worthy to be loved and love in return." I promise it will make a difference. Keep hope. It gets better!

Suzi
Posts: 26
Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 9:33 am

Re: Am I depressed?? Advice??

Postby Suzi » Fri Nov 17, 2017 6:41 pm

Did you get the private messages I sent. They are in my outbox and say they were sent, but they don't show up in my sent box.


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