Depression Understood Forums

Sometimes I honestly question why I even put up with all of it anymore. Other times I don't even care enough to try. No matter what I do, what I accomplish, I always feel like its never enough. Like I'm never enough. I can't hold on to a relationship. I can barely hold a job anymore without screaming. I can't go to classes in college. Everything no matter what it is is just too much. I wish I could do something. Or change something. Or feel something other than what I feel. But maybe I just am not cut out to survive in today's world. Maybe I just cant win the war even if I win every single battle.

It sounds like you're having a really difficult time at the moment. Are you perhaps too hard on yourself? You've mentioned not being good enough, not holding on to a relationship, the job, college but throughout, you're painting a picture that you've failed in some way. You have not failed. These are normal things which people experience but unlike many of us (myself included), they are just kinder to themselves. Have you thought about CBT? - There's plenty of good quality reading material on the subject and it may be worth looking at. Let me know if you'd like any more information on it and I'd be happy to help you find something suitable. If not, my advice, for what it's worth, is to try stop beating yourself up. Perhaps the first step would be to think about that and acknowledge that you may be doing this. Take care.