vega wrote:trying to tell yourself you'll still be loveable is such joke when you know for fact that nobody would want to waste their time on a 14 year old methhead and pill popper. I'm a mess. I hate myself for it. I just want to be wanted, but I know I'll never even let anybody get close to me, and burden them with my addiction. it isn't right.
14 years old?
You haven't even begun to realize life and in less than 5 years you won't even remember most of the people who now tick you off.
Being 14 and a mess is a damn rite of passage for every self-respecting teenager
Loose the drugs and start anew - at your age you still got six of your seven lifes left.
Every middle class moron can easily get 70 these days and still be runnig around making a mess of himself.
That is 5 times(!) your current lifespan - so imagine you got five reruns left to screw up and start from scratch again.
Just don't kill nobody (including yourself) and leave the "love" part to fate and happenstance.
Love will find you (too many people on this planet to avoid that), the real problems start once it leaves you again
But then you just wait for the next run - again